Evangelion - The End and After, Book 1 New Beginnings
by The Karolingian
Summary: Set after the events of End of Evangelion, Asuka struggles to come to terms with the new world Shinji gave to humanity, populated by those who chose to reject instrumentality, in which she feels alone like never before. That is until a certain blue haired former Eva pilot steps back into her life...
1. Chapter 1

**The End and After**

 **Book 1. New Beginnings**

 **1.**

Third Impact. The end of everything and the beginning of the new genesis. It was safe to say, it wasn't quite what Asuka would have expected. For a start, it would have been a lot more believable if things hadn't returned to how they had been before the arrival of the angels quite so quickly. Not her life, obviously, that had been fundamentally and irrevocably changed during the cataclysmic events linked to the coming of the angels and to the process of instrumentality itself. Dark memories from dark times. When she closed her eyes, she could still see the giant limbs and the blank face and eyes of the being that had been Rei (one of so many different Rei's it seemed) but had been reduced to monolithic human parts bathed in a red sea straight out of the book of revelations.

Not the other's lives either: Gendo, Ritsuko and Kaji were all apparently still dead. Misato, while miraculously alive (something for which Asuka believed Shinji was responsible), had yet to come to terms with the death of her love, let alone her own resurrection. Shinji himself was a wreck even now, his mind still recovering from experiences no human should have to go through and Asuka thought that he would never be quite the same again.

No, what was surprising was how the red seas had receded, how the gargantuan remains had faded away, how quickly greenery had returned and cities had been rebuilt. The world returned and so did the countless masses of ordinary people, each wanting to return to their day to day lives.

Again, Asuka was vaguely aware that Shinji was responsible for this somehow, but she was unable to work out why that should be. It didn't help that her former comrade in arms (if never quite her companion in life) had taken it upon himself to go into a period of extended exile and had seemingly disappeared off the face of the earth, telling her no more than 'he would be safe' before he did so. Asuka found she didn't mind him taking a sabbatical; there had been a time when she had wanted to be with the troubled young man, even if she hadn't been quite able to admit it to herself at the time, but those feelings had been lost amidst the horrors she had encountered before and after her death (and for some reason, still remembered). Perhaps one day they could be reignited, though this time hopefully in a less destructive form and when Shinji was better equipped to receive them, but until that time might come around, what she really felt now was numb.

The terrible truth about her life post apocalypse was that she was lost. Not in the way she had been, when she had been torn apart beneath her tough veneer by the pain of her past and of her mother's suicide, this was an entirely new form of lost. She was alone, not as she had been before, surrounded by people who didn't understand her, by people she abused and blocked out, but now alone in the true meaning of the word.

* * *

The hell of it, as it seemed to her, was that the rest of the world seemed to be healing just fine. Sitting in a café filled with smiling, grateful people, she reflected on how these humans were so different from the ones that had inhabited the lands before. Times were still hard, but the collective knowledge of what they had all been through seemed to have changed humanity into a more caring and collective kind of people, less ready to lash out and more ready to tolerate hardship in order to help others as well as themselves. The old flaws and negative personality traits still existed, of course, mankind hadn't been transformed into smiling robots. More, they were caught amid the still swelling feelings of relief that they had been tested and had come through. That mankind had been close to the brink of self-wrought annihilation, and yet, contrary to all expectations, had turned away and been saved.

Not that this held much comfort for Asuka. Every part of her life had been stripped away by those events. Her friends and colleagues had all but disappeared, her feelings of love – for Shinji, for Kaji – had vanished. Even the conflict within her, surrounding her mother, had been quelled; her mother had been damaged, she knew that now, partly by Asuka's father leaving her and partly by her own hand. Asuka may have been caught in the turbulent wake of that event, but she had finally realised that her mother had indeed loved her, in her own way. So, what she was left with was emptiness and solitude.

Still, life had to go on. And go on it did, quite impressively so. The new city which had sprung up near to the ruins of Tokyo 3 (and which had fittingly been named Kaibyaku) already had several tall buildings and plenty of small businesses. In fact, Kaibyaku was already comparatively bustling, considering its construction so far had only taken a year and a half. Asuka had taken to going to cafés as a means of escaping her small and silent apartment, and it was in one of these cafés that she now sat, reflecting absently on her life. After Third Impact, she had found that she couldn't face making new acquaintances, a big change from the formally brash and outgoing girl she had once been. This was just another thing that disturbed her about her new life. In one of the cafés she had been going to, the owner had become familiar with her and on a couple of occasions had attempted conversation. She stopped going there and, after that, attempted to avoid frequenting any cafés or bars or even shops and public places, preferring to move around the city and keep herself to herself. The cafe she was sitting in right now was quite a way from the tenements that had been assigned to her by the new 'people's council' that served as government for this city during the period of change everyone was going through, but that was fine, because there was no one here who might recognise her.

No, that was a lie. Everyone recognised her, at least on some level. They all had varying degrees of recollection of the events Asuka had a hand in shaping and so she was often the recipient of double takes and mistaken greetings. They knew her, because Shinji knew her. Asuka didn't know how that was possible, but she felt strongly that it was the case. What was different here was that nobody had any real relation to her, so she was rarely bothered by them. And that was fine.

Technically she wasn't entirely alone, of course. Maya (whom she had previously known solely as Lieutenant Ibuki) was also somewhere in the city and had even offered company should Asuka require it. However, Maya didn't seem to have taken her own resurrection quite so calmly as Asuka had; she couldn't understand or accept her own life, when others – in particular Doctor Ritsuko – were not similarly blessed. The former administrator and technician had taken to drinking a little more heavily than was healthy and, although she was making more progress at rebuilding her life than Asuka had so far managed, her 'company' complete with drunken rants and fits of weeping, was often more painful than comforting.

And so she had begun avoiding meeting with Maya. Hikari moved away, as did Touji (though she had never really been friends with him, or Kensuke who hadn't returned at all). And of course Shinji had disappeared, and shortly after, Misato had followed him. Most likely in the literal sense of the word. Asuka got the impression that feelings for the cowardly and yet courageous boy had stirred within Misato shortly before the events of Third Impact, and what with Kaji's status remaining firmly in the deceased column post apocalypse, she had decided that these feelings weren't necessarily things to be discouraged.

Asuka sipped the sweet black coffee that had gone cold a while ago without her noticing, and stared, unseeing, at the wooden table top before her. Again, there had been a time when knowing these things would have ignited passionate responses towards the Major, but those times seemed long gone. Now she was alone. Now she was empty, surrounded by happy, relieved people and feeling none of it. What she needed, she decided without even really thinking about it, was some kind of shock. Something to shake her up and make her feel like she was a part of this world again and not just some ghostly interloper upon a place that reminded her of home.

The thought was there and gone so quickly she never even remembered having it afterwards. This, of course, was in part because almost immediately after having this thought, she actually did receive a shock that very nearly had the desired effect, in itself.

* * *

Asuka heard the door to the café open and was aware of a sudden dip in the chatter that flew about the room. Looking up to discover the reason for the hush, she was faced with a sight that she at once knew was utterly impossible. But then, the impossible very often became possible around those that had once worked for Nerv, as was being proved here once again.

Standing in the doorway, still and quiet and staring directly at her, was a vision straight out of her nightmares; the figure of Rei Ayanami, the first child, the aloof and emotionless girl that had so frustrated and enraged the fiery redhead during their time at Nerv. She was alive. She was standing before her, looking as blank as ever and yet, piercing Asuka with her vermilion gaze.

Asuka's eyes widened in horror. Her throat closed up, the lights around her suddenly became too bright and the world seemed to white out, the sounds of the hushed café drowned by electric silence ringing in her ears.


	2. Chapter 2

**2.**

When Asuka came to her senses, mere moments later, the apparition hadn't moved. She still stood in the doorway, looking exactly as she had when Asuka saw her last. She wore her white plug suit and had old, blood-stained bandages on her right hand and over her right eye. There were probably more bandages beneath the suit, but Asuka couldn't see these. Asuka, on the other hand, looked completely different from the time she had been at Nerv; she wore old clothes and a long and scuffed brown jacket to cover them, her red hair was a little longer and much more unkempt than it had once been, and her clear blue eyes held none of the fire that had made her such a formidable young lady. However, as she sat in shock, staring at the old comrade that seemed to have stepped straight out of her nightmares, a brief flicker of that old fire returned and then was gone again.

"Pilot Sohryu..." said the girl. And then nothing more. There was no way for Asuka to tell whether this was a greeting, a call for help, or the knell like accusation of a literary phantom. Rei's voice was as flat and emotionless as it ever had been.

There was a clattering sound as one of the patrons stood abruptly, knocking his chair spinning. He pointed a shaking finger at Rei and cried out in a voice that bordered on hysteria.

"It's her! The monster from the end!"

A collective gasp went around the room.

"Is it happening again?" asked another, terror evident in his own voice, "Is she here to do it all again?"

Rei didn't even seem to hear the men. She stood silently for another moment her eye fixed on Asuka and then repeated,

"Pilot Sohryu."

Asuka stood slowly and felt every pair of eyes in the room turn on her.

"Is this real?" she asked, her voice unsteady, "Are you here for me?" Rei nodded.

"There was no one else... I..."

This was different. Asuka had never heard indecision or uncertainty in Ayanami's voice before. A sudden buzz went round the room, that quietened quickly as Asuka stepped forward. She looked around her at the thunderstruck people, all staring at her, then quickened her pace, reaching Rei's side and seizing her hand. Asuka dragged her swiftly outside, where she stopped and fumbled in her pockets for the key that started the old Nissan she had managed to scrounge enough money together to buy recently. Rei stood by her side, plug suit and all, a vision of the hell Asuka thought she had escaped, making any kind of structured thought impossible.

"Pilot Sohryu?"

"Why are you here?" asked Asuka, avoiding looking at her old colleague.

"I asked to be," replied Rei, simply.

Behind them, the door to the cafe opened. Asuka grabbed Rei's hand again, pulling her down the street to where she had parked her car. It was battered and green, something she wouldn't have been caught dead getting into not so long ago. Slotting the key into the lock, she opened it and held the door for Ayanami.

"Get in," she instructed. Rei complied and Asuka quickly moved around to the other side and climbed in herself. A moment later the car started and she pulled out into the sparse traffic.

* * *

Twenty minutes later they were entering Asuka's apartment. The car journey had been hellish for her; even looking at Rei had been extremely difficult and questions had continuously tumbled through her mind, questions that fear prevented her from asking. She didn't know why she had taken Rei with her, why she hadn't just run away screaming. That was what her mind had most wanted her to do, and now, entering the closed environment of her dwelling, the desire to do so was growing ever stronger.

Rei, on the other hand, had remained silent in the car. She never made any threatening gesture, nor displayed any of the terrifying magic she had demonstrated just prior to and during Third Impact. There was something about her manner, though, that was different from before. She didn't quite seem comfortable (if comfortable was the right word for one so interminably separate as her) in the car, as if she wanted to say something, but couldn't come close to even beginning to form words.

Asuka held the door open once again as Rei moved into her last refuge, and she fought the urge to push her back out and barricade the entrance. When Rei had passed inside, Asuka closed the door and then turned to face her.

"Why are you here?" she blurted out, all the tension from the car journey suddenly spilling free.

"I asked to –" started Rei, beginning to repeat what she had said on the street.

"NO! Why are you here right now!" cried Asuka, "Why have you come to me?"

"There was no one else..." said Rei, "I... the commander is dead..."

"I know that!" snapped Asuka, "You killed him!"

Rei bowed her head.

"I couldn't go to him because he is dead," she said, "I couldn't go to Shinji, because he told me not to."

"Well, I'm telling you not to come to me!" yelled Asuka.

Rei nodded. She turned away towards the door, making to open it and leave.

"What the hell?!" cried Asuka, incredulously, "You come all this way, you come back to life to see me and then you just leave?"

"You asked me to leave," replied Rei, looking round, confusion creeping into her voice.

"Are you real?!" said Asuka.

Rei nodded again.

"Are you alive and here right now? This isn't just a nightmare I'm having, is it?"

"It's not," replied Rei.

"Then why are you here? What do you want from me?"

"I need... help... your help. There wasn't anyone else."

Rei again looked uncomfortable, like she was struggling with something she didn't understand.

"You're not here to start Fourth Impact?" asked Asuka. Rei shook her head. "You're not here to kill me?"

"Why should I do that?" asked Rei, her brow furrowing slightly. She took a step forward and Asuka flinched slightly.

 _This isn't like me_ , she thought, _I'm behaving like a frightened kitten when it's obvious she means me no harm_.

Still, the memories she carried, the ones she seemed to have been given by Shinji, and in particular the ones about her death and what happened shortly after, clamoured in her mind every time she looked at the pilot of Unit 00.

 _Because that's what she still is, even after all this time_. _She looks like she's just stepped out of her Eva five minutes ago_.

Rei had stopped at Asuka's flinch. There was again a look of uncertainty on her face that would never have been there normally.

"I... think I need a coffee," said Asuka after a long moment in which they simply stared at each other. "Would you like a coffee?"

Rei nodded the affirmative, standing irresolutely in Asuka's entrance hall. The red head sighed, some of the tension leaving her body. It was now obvious that she wasn't a danger. In fact, if anything, Rei looked more lost than Asuka felt.

"Well, come in then, Wonder Girl."

She led her into the small lounge area that the little apartment afforded her and then once Rei was seated at her kotatsu, Asuka went into the kitchen to prepare coffee. She found her hands were shaking more than a little and she couldn't help spilling granules over her work surface as she made up a cafetière and boiled the water. She also couldn't seem to help herself drinking the first cup she poured in three quick gulps, before she poured another for herself and one for Rei. She found milk sugar and cream and placed them all on a tray and carried them back into the other room. The crockery clinked loudly in her still shaking hands as she placed the tray on the kotatsu.

"I didn't know how you liked it... so I brought everything..."

Rei didn't answer, just as she so often hadn't when they had been at Nerv together. It had used to infuriate Asuka to no end, but right now she was too nervous to be annoyed. The blue haired girl sat placidly at the kotatsu, her hands resting in her lap, staring at nothing in particular as Asuka sat down.

"Are... you okay?" she asked Rei and the other girl looked at her.

"I am healthy, I think. My eye hurts. The rest of me has healed since the last mission."

 _Since the last mission? Does that mean since the last angel or since we all died?_ wondered Asuka.

"Where have you been all this time? A year and a half has passed since Third Impact."

Rei looked at her blankly.

"I don't know. I don't think I would understand if I did."

"Yet you turn up now, completely out of the blue?" said Asuka, "You scare me half to death and –"

"You are different," said Rei, suddenly.

"Of course I'm different!" snapped Asuka, "Anyone would be different after the things I've been through!"

"You're also the same," said Rei, her blank expression never faltering. To Asuka's astonishment, she saw that underneath the blankness there was actually something there. Something like curiosity. Or wonder, perhaps.

She sighed and sat back, looking at Rei carefully.

"Why have you come back now?"

"I came back because I chose to," replied Rei.

"Right, right, and you came to me because there was no one else... hang on, you said just now that Shinji told you not to go to him?" Rei nodded. "You've seen Shinji?" pressed Asuka. Rei nodded again.

"He said he couldn't help me. He has his own struggle."

"You've seen Shinji..." repeated Asuka, more to herself than Rei, though the blue haired girl obediently nodded again. Asuka chewed her lip, subconsciously. "How was he?" she asked, after a pause.

"He was healthy," replied Rei, but then, sensing she needed to say more: "he looked thin. He is still struggling with his world."

 _His world_ , thought Asuka. Rei was probably right, this _was_ his world. The world he had recreated after Third Impact. It seemed that the experiences he'd had were too much to contain himself and he had given everyone, all the people on the planet it seemed, Asuka included, at least some of the memories of the final few hours of the old world. Which was how Asuka knew a little of how Gendo and Ritsuko and even Kaji had died. It was also how Asuka knew of events after her own demise and prior to her subsequent resurrection.

She suddenly realised that neither of the pair had yet touched their coffees. She sat forwards depositing two spoonfuls of sugar into her black coffee and stirring it.

"You should drink that before it gets cold," she told Rei, "how do you like it?"

"I don't know," replied Rei. She reached out her hand to the cup and lifted it slowly to her lips, taking a small sip.

"Warm," she said, "bitter." She looked at Asuka. "Is that good?"

Asuka flushed, partly with annoyance, partly with embarrassment.

"Well, my coffee should be good," she snapped, "it always used to be, but then, as you say, I've changed. Anyway, are you saying you don't know whether you like it?"

"I've never attached importance to taste before," replied Rei, quietly. She looked at Asuka again, her one good eye wide and red. "Is taste important in life?"

"What kind of question is that?!" cried Asuka, "Of course it's important. What you like and dislike is a fundamental for normal people."

"I'm not a normal person," said Rei.

"You can say that again, Wonder Girl!" agreed Asuka.

"You are not a normal person, either," said Rei, "but taste is important to you?"

This obviously wasn't intended as an attack, but Asuka chose to take it that way because it meant she didn't have to deal with the uncomfortable first half of the statement.

"Fine!" she said, irritably. She stood and made her way to the kitchen again, returning with several more coffee cups. "Like is easy," she stated, as she retook her seat and set the cups up before Rei, "try that coffee again, then try adding some milk, or some sugar and see which way you prefer it."

"Prefer?" asked Rei.

"Which one you'd like to keep drinking if you only had one choice."

"Choice..." said Rei, "yes, I chose to come here, I have choice."

She sipped the coffee again and then picked up the milk jug, carefully pouring a small measure into the cup.

"Different," she said once she had sampled it, "less bitter... Smoother..."

Asuka found herself watching intently, enthralled by this display of methodical discovery. She poured another cup and added some sugar then handed it to Rei, who tasted it carefully.

"Sweet, but still bitter."

"That's how I take it nowadays," said Asuka. She poured another cup and added cream this time.

"Thicker," said Rei, "a little cloying..."

"There you go," said Asuka, "'cloying' is definitely an emotional response, something I never thought I'd get out of you at least. Some people like it like that though... You can try any combination, you know, with different measurements of each substance."

 _Measurements of each substance?_ thought Asuka, _That sounded like something Rei would have said_. _She's been back five minutes and already her manner is affecting me_...

And she marvelled at how, in the space of thirty minutes, she had gone from fearing for her life to mere mild annoyance at the one who had caused the Third Impact. She'd even slipped back into the old nickname without even noticing it.

 _Though that was slightly unfair_ , she thought, _Rei may have been the catalyst, but it was Gendo that had manipulated her, pushing her towards the final cataclysm_. _It was Gendo's selfishness in trying to bring back his dead wife that had brought about the conditions suitable for Third Impact to take place_.

Well, that may have been true, but what was also true was that they were each partly responsible. From Shinji to Ritsuko and Misato to herself. Even Kaji had a hand, through throwing his life away when he could have been searching for a way to stop what was going to happen.

Five minutes passed as Rei experimented and sampled various coffee concoctions, seemingly unaware of a now calm (and slightly bemused) Asuka watching her intently.

"I... _prefer_ this one," said Rei finally holding up the black coffee with one sugar, looking to Asuka for some kind of affirmation. Asuka was still watching her.

"Is that why you came here? To find out what kind of coffee you like?" she asked. Rei didn't answer. "Come on, Wonder Girl, you can tell me after coming all this way."

"I came here because I chose to live," replied Rei slowly. And again she looked like she was struggling with something.

"And you want me to show you how to live?" asked Asuka. Rei shook her head.

"I want you to tell me _why_ I chose to live," she replied.

The answer quite took her by surprise.

"Why me?" asked Asuka, "Why not Maya, or Misato, or any of the other survivors?"

"I never talked to Lieutenant Ibuki, or Hikari, or anyone else apart from Shinji and you and Major Katsuragi and Commander Ikari. I could not go to Major Katsuragi because of her proximity to Shinji –"

 _Well, I was right about that, then,_ thought Asuka.

"– I could not go to Commander Ikari because he is dead," finished Rei. She actually looked a little drained at saying so much at once, but sudden indignation was flaring in Asuka.

"You'd actually go back to that bastard even after what he did to you?" she asked. Rei nodded.

"He created me, he is the reason I exist at all."

"Bullshit!" cried the young German, "If he were alive, I'd kill the bastard before letting you go back to him!"

Rei said nothing, but for once, this didn't enrage Asuka more. Instead, she sat back on her hands and sighed.

"I may have changed, but you sure as hell haven't much," said Asuka.

"Not much time has passed for me since Third Impact," replied Rei, evenly. Asuka regarded her for a moment.

"How long have you been... back?" she asked.

"Four weeks," the blue haired girl replied, "I found Shinji easily, but finding you was harder."

"Four weeks," mused Asuka, "and I bet you haven't changed out of that plug suit once, have you? Where are you staying?"

"I have no residence," said Rei.

Asuka smacked her forehead.

"Geez! What am I going to do with you? How long is it since you washed?" Again, Rei declined to answer. "Right! The first thing we're going to do is get you out of that suit and into a hot bath."

Asuka stood purposefully and walked round the table to where Rei was sitting.

"Come on," she said, holding out her hand. Rei looked at it for a second and then joined it with her own.


	3. Chapter 3

**3.**

Asuka led Rei through her small apartment until they reached the bathroom. She ran the taps and the bath began to fill.

"I assume you know how to work something like a bath, Wonder Girl?" she asked. Rei nodded. "Good, then get yourself out of that horrible plug suit and use it. I'll go find you some clothes. If I'm letting you stay here, you need better things to wear than that thing."

"You're letting me stay?" asked Rei.

"Well I'm not chucking you out on the street," replied Asuka. "Your bandages, do you need a hand?"

Rei shook her head.

"They are unnecessary now."

"Good, well, see you in a bit then."

She left the bathroom, which was now rapidly filling with steam, and closed the door behind her. Then she went to her bedroom, opened her drawers and began searching through the clothes she had scraped together for something she thought might be suitable for Rei. She settled for a white shirt and a long dark skirt, with some long socks and pumps. Clothes had lost a lot of their importance to her since Third Impact, but now that she looked through them, she was a little chagrined to find there weren't any in her collection that she really liked the look of.

"Well, these will have to do for now," she said aloud, picking up the bundle and taking them back to the bathroom. Steam was escaping from under the door, to be lost in the cool air of the corridor and there was the faint sounds of splashing water coming from within.

"Rei?" called Asuka.

"Yes," came the reply.

"Are you okay in there?"

"I am fine... I have always liked water."

"I've got some clothes for you," said Asuka, "I'll leave them outside the door."

"Thankyou, pilot Sohryu," replied Rei.

"Right! That's something else that's got to stop," she said in exasperation. "My name is Asuka, not 'Pilot Sohryu'!"

"But we are both Eva pilots..." said Rei, confusion in her voice.

"Is that the only way you define yourself?" asked Asuka, and when she was met with silence: "The Evas are gone, Rei, and thank god! We have nothing to do with them any more. Besides, I always hated the way you called me Pilot Sohryu. Like I was nothing more than that to you."

There was another pause from the bathroom, during which Asuka faintly heard splashing water.

"I didn't know," said Rei, in a voice almost too quiet for her to hear. Asuka suddenly felt very guilty.

"Hey, Rei? I treated you pretty badly back then, didn't I?" No answer. "I've always felt guilty about it since. Perhaps if I'd been nicer to you, things would have turned out differently..."

"They wouldn't have," replied Ayanami.

They both lapsed into silence for a while, Asuka with her own thoughts. Eventually, she stirred.

"Well, I'll leave these things for you here then. Take your time in there."

She was about to leave when a sudden thought struck her, making her pause.

"Rei?" she called through the closed door. There was a moment of silence, then her reply filtered back.

"I am here, Pilot So-... Asuka."

"Well, um, it's just... Don't think me rude or anything," _too late for that, surely,_ "but I wanted to ask you a... difficult question."

"Go ahead," replied Ayanami.

"Well... which Rei are you? I know now there were lots of you. Did I ever even meet you personally?"

Asuka heard Ayanami inhale deeply before replying.

"I think..." she began, "I think I'm all of the Rei's... and none of them. I'm the Rei you knew and I'm a Rei that could have been." There was another pause, then: "Does that answer your question?"

"Not really..." replied Asuka.

"I am me," said Rei, "that's all that matters."

"Still..." said Asuka, "If you aren't the Rei I used to know –"

"I remember... I remember you. I remember the way you hated me. I remember you calling me a doll. I remember you hitting me."

"Rei, I –"

"I also remember saving you... and wanting to save you. My hand remembers holding longinus. It remembers the weight, the heft. My mind remembers how terrible it felt, even as I used it to save you. I am the Rei you knew."

A great wave of shame and sorrow welled up in her chest. Partly for the way she had treated the Eva pilot, partly for the callousness of her question.

"I'm sorry," said Asuka, then wondered briefly if that was the first time she'd ever used that word with Rei. "I'll leave you now, I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't," replied Rei. "Please stay. Your presence is... comforting."

"Fine!" said Asuka, in a short tone of voice. But inside she felt warm at Rei's words. It had been a long time since she had felt needed by anyone.

Asuka sat down with her back to the door and wrapped her hands around her knees.

"What shall we talk about?" she asked. Again she was met by silence. "Why do you always do that? Why do you never answer questions?"

"I was thinking of a suitable response," replied Rei, "I hadn't found one yet."

"Right, right," said Asuka, "well, how about we talk about what you're going to do now?"

"Okay," said Rei.

"What will you do? I mean, you can stay here, but I'm not supporting you or anything. You'll have to find a job and get some money..."

"What do you do for money?" asked Rei.

"I used to work in construction doing manual labour," replied Asuka. "After Third Impact, everyone had to pull together and do whatever needed doing, even kids like us."

 _I finally admitted that I'm a kid just then,_ she thought to herself, _and after years and years of trying to be an adult_. _Well, maybe I accepted that after Third Impact_... _still, I'm acting more like an adult now than I ever did at Nerv_...

"What do you do now?" asked Rei.

"I still work on building sites," she replied, "though now I work with the heavy construction vehicles. I guess the foreman realised how good I was with machines."

 _So perhaps I am still Pilot Sohryu, after all_.

There was quiet on the other side of the door, then Rei spoke again.

"Perhaps I could do the same."

"I doubt the foreman would allow it. We're not taking just anyone any more. Things have got a lot better."

"But you still work there?" queried Rei.

"I'm a special case. They all know me and know I'm capable, even if I am still a kid. Besides, they also know that I really need the job, so they just let me get on with it. But, come on Rei, there must be other stuff you'd like to do? Jobs are hardly scarce at the moment... What do you enjoy doing?"

"I enjoy... swimming."

"Hmmm, then I suppose you could be a swimming instructor, if there's any call for that... Then again, with your personality, perhaps not. Anything else?"

There was a long pause, a very long pause, but Asuka decided not to pressure her this time. Still, as the silence grew longer and longer, she began to wonder whether the blue haired girl had fallen asleep in the bath.

"Rei?" she finally attempted. There was the sound of splashing water, much louder than before, then feet were padding across her bathroom floor, making the boards creak slightly.

 _She's getting out of the bath_ , thought Asuka, _maybe she's done_.

Suddenly, the door against which she was leaning, opened behind her and Asuka found herself falling backwards. A completely naked and dripping Rei stood above Asuka, looking down at her as she sprawled, amazed, upon the floor.

"I cannot think of anything," said the blue haired girl, and there was a look on her face that Asuka had never seen before; frustration. And worry...

And she was naked.

NAKED.

"B-BAKA!" cried Asuka, sitting up quickly and turning her gaze towards the floor. "Don't just wander around without any clothes on!"

"The water was going cold," said Rei, as if that was a reason for doing so.

"F-Fine, fine," stammered Asuka, "just put some clothes on. They're right there."

She pointed to the small bundle that lay beside her.

"Thankyou Pil-... Asuka."

And out of the corner of her eye, Asuka saw a pale, slender arm appear as Rei bent to pick up the clothes. The arm disappeared from view once more and the door closed again. Asuka found herself breathing a big sigh of relief.

 _That was a shock_ , she thought.

"I hope they are warm enough for the season," she said as her heartbeat gradually returned to normal, "I really need to get some proper winter clothes soon, we'll have to go shopping and get you some too."

The door opened again and Asuka stood and turned round. Rei stood before her in the clothes she had been given. They didn't really suit her, but they didn't look terrible either. Asuka also realised that the eye bandage had been removed, revealing her right eye. It was bloodshot and looked sore, heightening the red impression of her gaze all the more.

"Your eye, is it okay?" she asked, and without thinking reached out her hand to touch Rei's cheek. Rei did not move, but her eyes shifted to the hand as it reached towards her. This caused Asuka to realise what she was doing and she dropped it quickly back to her side.

"I-I'm sorry!" she stuttered.

"Why?" asked Rei. Asuka was lost for an answer. In truth, she didn't really know. Everything seemed to have gone a bit crazy since Rei had turned up and Asuka found that she didn't really understand much any more. About Rei, about her past, about herself.

 _Still, being confused is better than being emotionally dead_ , a dark part of her mind spoke up, y _ou're making progress at last_. _And it's all because Wonder Girl turned up again_.

"Anyway," said Asuka, blushing and looking away, "those clothes seem to fit you fine."

"Will these clothes help me?" asked Rei, plucking at the sleeve of the shirt.

"Help you what?" said Asuka, frowning.

"Understand why I chose to live," replied Rei.

Asuka opened her mouth. Then she closed it again. Then she thought about opening it again, decided against it as she had nothing to say, and closed her eyes instead. Suddenly she felt light headed, as though she was on the verge of a faint.

 _What do I say?_ she thought, desperately, _I have no answers for her, but she came all this way_. _How do I crush her like that?_

She tried not to think about how, not all that long ago, she would have been delighted to have been presented a chance to crush Rei.

Well, perhaps not _delighted_...

"Asuka?" asked Rei, "Are you all right."

"I'm fine," said Asuka, opening her eyes and smiling ruefully, "I'm just not sure I'm the one who can give you the answers you want."

 _Oh, get a grip_ , another part of her mind suddenly shouted, one she hadn't heard from in a while, _you always despised Shinji for being so pathetic, now you're being pathetic yourself_.

She wasn't inclined to listen to that part of her mind just yet, though. It had been the cause of too much pain in the past...

"There is no one else other than you," said Rei, "if you cannot, then no one can."

"Rei..." began Asuka, but again found no more words willing to follow.

"I... need you," said Rei. The distress in her voice was plain. It caused Asuka to wilt.

"I'm just not sure I believe in myself that much any more," she whispered.

"I believe in you," replied Rei, reaching out her own hand to touch Asuka's cheek, "I always did..."

Asuka couldn't stop a tear slipping from the corner of her eye. She brushed it away savagely.

"Great!" she muttered, "I'm turning into Shinji after all." She looked fiercely at Rei. "Fine, I'll try, but it'll be a slow business. Who knows if you'll ever get an answer? Right now though, it's getting late and I'm feeling more than a little emotionally shattered. You must be too. I suggest we both turn in."

Rei nodded.


	4. Chapter 4

**4.**

However, resting presented a problem Asuka hadn't counted on. Her apartment was a single bedroom affair and she had no sofa. She'd never really expected guests, so she didn't even have spare bedding. When this was pointed out, the response she received was typical Rei.

"I can sleep on the floor."

"No you bloody can't," said Asuka, "you'll freeze to death with only those clothes to keep you warm!"

And she probably wasn't exaggerating all that much. Winter hadn't quite crept up on Kaibyaku, but it was unseasonably cold for the time of year and the apartment's heating system wasn't all that reliable. Asuka chewed on her lip as she looked around for a solution.

"Fine," she said, at last, "It'll be a bit cramped, but we can both sleep in my bed for tonight."

Rei looked a little concerned by this.

"I've only ever slept alone before," she said.

"It'll be fine," assured Asuka, "as long as you don't kick me out of bed. We're both girls after all."

Rei still looked worried, but she nodded anyway.

Pyjamas were the next order of the day. Asuka rummaged through her drawers again and then handed Rei her spare set. They were a cool blue colour that matched Ayanami's hair, while the pair Asuka wore were pale pink. Then they each sat on opposite sides of the bed while they changed.

"No peeking," growled Asuka as they did so, and she smiled to herself a little. When she had changed, she jumped under the covers to get away from the chill air that was getting colder by the minute. The heating still hadn't come on, and perhaps wouldn't now. Still, there was nothing to be done about it.

Rei turned off the light and got into the bed much more carefully than Asuka had. Then they both lay on their backs, side by side, their shoulders touching. For a while the quiet was a little uncomfortable as Asuka stared up at the ceiling, tired and yet wide awake. She glanced across at Rei and saw she was doing the same.

"Hey," she said, returning her eyes to the ceiling, "talk to me?"

"About what, Asuka?" asked Rei.

"Tell me how Shinji is doing," said Asuka, "where is he? What is he doing?"

"He seems to be doing much the same as you are. He has a small house, he does jobs, he helps people. Major Katsuragi lives nearby. She helps him."

Asuka looked at her again.

"She loves him, doesn't she?"

"I don't know," replied Rei, "if you think she does, then probably."

"I do," said Asuka, then after a pause: "You have feelings for him as well, don't you."

Rei looked at her, mildly.

"Of course," she said, "we are biologically related, after all."

"Oh!" exclaimed Asuka, "Well, yes, I'd forgotten about that..."

"You have feelings for Shinji too, I think," said Rei, taking her by surprise. Then the surprise subsided and Asuka sighed. It wasn't that much of a revelation anyway, even if Rei was the one saying it.

"I did," she replied, "I made a mess of it though... we both did. Now, I don't know..."

They stared into each others eyes for a little while, not needing to speak, feeling almost as though their minds were touching in the dark.

"Rei," said Asuka after a while, turning her body towards Rei, "your eyes are amazing."

The blue haired girl looked away.

"I never liked my eyes... I always hated the colour red."

"But I wore red all the time..." said Asuka, then her eyes widened. "Oh..." she finished, lamely.

"It wasn't because of you," said Rei. "Red was a bad colour. It was the colour of the tank in which I was grown. It was the colour of the dying sun. It was the colour of blood..."

"It still is as far as I'm aware," said Asuka, then immediately regretted it. To her own ears, she sounded as if she was mocking Rei's pain. To try to cover this up, she went on. "Hey, do you still hate red?"

Rei turned her head towards Asuka, looking at her with wide eyes.

"I don't know," she said, "I think, partly, it was because I hated myself."

"I think we all did that," replied Asuka, then her eyes widened again, "hated ourselves I mean, not..."

Rei looked at her as she trailed off and Asuka saw nothing in her face that suggested she had offended her. Asuka felt relieved. Probably it would be impossible to hurt Rei with words, even if they were intended maliciously. She sighed again and closed her eyes.

"Gaah, I think everyone at Nerv was screwed up – me especially. It was a screwed up place at a screwed up time."

Asuka felt Rei shift next to her then there was silence and stillness, save for the motions of their breathing.

 _Perhaps she wants to go to sleep_ , thought Asuka, and she decided to keep her eyes closed in case slumber would come to her also. In fact, she was just drifting when she felt a light touch on her cheek, as fingertips brushed her skin.

Her eyes snapped open and she saw Rei watching her intently. Her hand withdrew as they stared at one another. Asuka was suddenly wide awake once again, her heart beating significantly faster than it had been moments before.

"What are you doing?" asked the young German, breaking the silence between them.

"You looked peaceful," said Rei, her expression and tone neutral.

"Of course I did, I was almost asleep!" replied Asuka.

"I've never seen someone sleep peacefully before. I wonder, do I look the same when I sleep?"

 _Okay, okay, she was just investigating, that's all_ , thought Asuka, _nothing to worry about_.

And why should she be worried? She'd already said that they were both girls, what could possibly happen? She tried not to think about how flushed she had suddenly become.

"H-How should I know?" she replied, "I've never slept with you before, you could kick and scream for all I know!"

And now she was trying not to think of the words 'slept with you' in such close proximity to the word 'scream'.

 _This is stupid!_ she thought, _She's a girl, you're a girl, neither of you swing that way_.

Well, maybe, but even if that was true of herself, how could she be sure of Rei? Wait, no, the Rei she had known wouldn't ever think about those kinds of things, surely? Besides, she probably didn't even _know_ about those kinds of things. 'Sheltered' was an understatement when applied to the former pilot of Eva Unit 00. But then –

 _Stop thinking about it!_ her mind screamed, _Or you'll never be able to sleep!_

"Perhaps you could tell me sometime," said Rei. And with that, she closed her own eyes and settled against her pillow.

"Yeah..." said Asuka, in an uncertain voice, staring at Rei a little warily. She found herself still watching Rei rather too many moments later and forcibly shut her eyes.

"Asuka?" said Rei, making her eyes snap open again. The girl next to her still had hers closed, however.

"Yes...?" Asuka replied slowly.

"You have soft skin," said Rei in a faint voice.

 _AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!_ said her mind, helpfully.

But then she found that she was smiling, in spite of herself. Smiling at the way she was behaving.

 _I really am stupid_ , she thought, _Rei is Rei, and I am me_. _Something like that could never happen_.

And with that, she closed her eyes one final time.

"Goodnight Rei," she murmured, as sleep stole over her.

No answer came.


	5. Chapter 5

**5.**

The birds singing lustily from beyond her curtain-less window weren't what woke Asuka the next morning. Nor was it the fact that the quilt had slipped from the bed while they slept, exposing any unclothed parts of their bodies to the chill air. No, what woke Asuka was the fact that while they had been asleep they had changed positions, until Rei was no longer beside her. She was in fact draped partly across her, with Asuka on her back, Rei's head resting on her shoulder and her hand resting... resting on... her... LEFT... BREAST...

Asuka yelped and sat up quickly, tipping Rei over as she did so. This was more than enough to wake her new bedfellow and Rei looked dazedly up at Asuka, rubbing her sleepy eyes.

"Asuka?" she murmured, "Is it time to get up?"

"Ha ha ha!" laughed Asuka, nervously, "Yep, rise and shine, Wonder Girl. It's getting late, it's already gone..." she glanced at her clock. "Six o-clock!" she cried, "It's still the middle of the night!"

A glance out of her window confirmed that the sky was not yet properly light. She flopped back on her pillow, groping around over the side of the bed with one hand for the escaped quilt so she could pull it back over her. Rei sat looking at her for a moment, then did the same. Happily for Asuka, she didn't resume her previous position, instead she retook the place she had originally occupied before they had gone to sleep the night before. Asuka pulled the quilt over Rei as well, then turned on her side to look at the blue haired girl, who was well on her way to falling asleep once again.

 _She didn't do it on purpose, I'm sure,_ she thought to herself, _and besides, it's only natural for someone feeling lost and alone to cling to someone else when in close proximity_. _In fact, she probably doesn't even know she did it_...

Well, that was true enough. But, thinking about it, wasn't Asuka's reaction stranger? Was she really so unused to physical contact that something as little as that had caused her to damn near suffer a panic attack? It hadn't used to have been a problem. When Kaji had been around, she'd had no qualms about draping herself over him whenever she could. Shinji too, she hadn't had any difficulty kissing him that one time (though that didn't turn out so well in the end). Of course, since Nerv disappeared, she'd been pretty much on her own and had perhaps become a bit of a recluse, which might explain the nervousness she'd been encountering since Rei had turned up.

 _That and fearing the end of the world was coming_... _again_ , she thought. Then she giggled at how ridiculous that seemed now.

Rei opened her eyes and looked at her.

"What are you laughing about?" she asked.

 _Self conscious are we, Wonder Girl?_ thought Asuka.

"Oh, nothing. I'm laughing at myself, really."

"Are you funny?" asked Rei.

"Ha! I suppose," replied Asuka, "You should try laughing sometime. It's good for you."

"It stimulates blood flow, it increases cell oxidation," stated Rei, as if she was reading from a text book. Then she stopped talking.

To Asuka's astonishment, Rei began forcing her face first into a smile, then into uncomfortable laughter.

"Ha ha ha," said Rei, then she stopped and her face returned to normal. "I don't feel any different."

"Well, of course you don't, baka! You can't laugh without feeling it inside. Laughing has to be natural."

"Natural..." echoed Rei and she closed her eyes again.

"Yeah, natural," said Asuka, then she trailed off, thinking about this for a while. "It's funny," she said, almost without realising she had started talking again, "I'd almost forgotten what laughing was like. It's been so long since I did it. Not that I really laughed that much at Nerv, I was always too busy trying to be superior and competing with you..."

She glanced at Rei and saw that she was watching her again. Her red eyes looked impossibly deep in the slowly lightening room.

"You never needed to compete with me," she said.

"Didn't I?" replied Asuka, heavily, "I'm not so sure. My life would have been completely empty without it..." she sighed. "Look, Rei, I think you've got the wrong person. I can't tell you about life. I don't know about life, myself. All I know about is pain."

"There isn't anyone else," said Rei, a small frown on her features.

"Isn't there?" replied Asuka, "Maya, Toji, Hikari, hell, some random person off the street... Anyone else would know more about life than me."

Rei slowly sat up and wrapped her arms around her knees, staring away from Asuka at the end of the bed. Asuka lay on her back watching the girl. For a while they both remained quiet.

"But..." said Rei, eventually, "I would not understand them..."

" _Understand_ them...?" replied Asuka, frowning. Rei turned to her.

"Asuka, you are a special person..."

"No I'm not!" said Asuka, sudden anger growing in her, though not anger directed towards Rei, "I spent ages trying to convince myself I was, but I'm just not. I never was, everyone at Nerv knew it!"

But Rei was shaking her head.

"You were chosen by Shinji, you were the first to be brought back by him... You're special to Shinji, who created this world."

"I don't know if you noticed, Rei, but Shinji isn't exactly around. He can't love me, otherwise he'd be here with me."

"I didn't mean love..." replied Rei, quietly, "though if love exists, I am certain he loves you."

"If love exists...?" said Asuka, her frown deepening.

"I don't know love..." said Rei, in an even quieter voice.

"Baka!" Asuka almost shouted, "Everyone loved you! Shinji loved you!"

"Shinji was afraid of me."

"Don't be stupid, Shinji was afraid of everyone, that doesn't mean he didn't love you. Besides, Misato loved you, too! Hell, even Gendo loved you in his own fucked up way!"

Rei looked at Asuka.

"You didn't..."

Suddenly Asuka found herself blushing.

"I... well... I'm not really... I mean..."

Rei just looked sad and alone. Asuka couldn't help her heart going out to the young girl.

"Look, Rei, I was an idiot back then. I probably still am. You don't want to worry about the things I said or thought."

"But I did," replied Rei, "I do. I... You..."

Rei was struggling again, struggling with something larger than her. She could see the pain it caused the former pilot clearly. It was too much for her. Asuka leapt forwards on the bed and wrapped her arms around the other girl.

"Oh, Rei! I really hurt you, didn't I? I'm so sorry," she mumbled. Tears were starting in her eyes.

Rei felt stiff in her arms. She made no move to stop Asuka, but then she also made no attempt to reciprocate the hug.

"What is it?" asked Asuka, pulling back a little.

"I... don't know how I should react in this situation," replied Rei.

"Baka!" whispered Asuka, "You're worse than Shinji."

She released Rei and sat back on her feet keeping her head down, obscuring her face with her fiery hair.

"Sorry," said Rei. And then she did something Asuka was not expecting. She began to cry. The tears seemed to astonish Rei as much as they did Asuka, for her eyes became wide and she looked down at the salt water that splashed onto her pyjamas, spreading gently across the fabric.

"I'm crying again," she whispered, to herself more than to Asuka.

 _I never thought I'd see that_...

"Rei?" asked Asuka. The blue haired girl looked up at her with wide, damp eyes.

"I... don't understand..." said Rei.

"You don't have to," replied Asuka, and she lifted her arms, inviting Ayanami with soft eyes. Rei sat for a moment looking at the outstretched arms, then her face bunched and she moved forwards into Asuka's embrace. The red head wrapped her arms around her and lay back, bringing them gently back down onto the bed. Then she pulled the quilt back over them and simply lay there as Rei hitched and sobbed silently into her chest. Though her tears were quiet, they were full of the pent up misery that had been Rei's life, both growing up at Nerv and after Shinji had brought about Instrumentality, when she had returned to the world only to find herself more alone than ever.

Asuka, too, was crying, though her tears did not match the intensity of Rei's. However, for what seemed like the first time, she found that the tears were not for herself, but for another. For Rei.

 _This is a time of firsts, it seems,_ she thought to herself, but then decided it was probably a good thing. All of a sudden, she found she _wanted_ to help Rei. It was important that Rei found happiness, if not the truth, and if that brought Asuka some kind of enlightenment along with it, then so much the better. And if not, well, she wouldn't have lost anything and would no doubt go on as she had been doing since coming to Kaibyaku.

Rei cried for a long while and Asuka hushed and soothed her, stroking her back with her fingertips and smoothing her ruffled hair. At last, the sobs lessened, but she clung to Asuka nonetheless for a good deal longer. The German had begun to doze lightly when Rei looked up at last, rousing her.

"Asuka, I'm sorry, I don't know... why I did that..."

Asuka smiled.

"Like I said, you don't have to worry about feeling sad, or even understand it. If you need support, you should just ask for it."

"I've never asked before..."

"Well, you can from now on. Ask me."

"Should I... smile now?" asked Rei. This question again surprised Asuka, but before she could come up with a response, Rei carried on. "I think this is like the time that Shinji saved me. He told me to smile then..."

She looked up at Asuka and her face lit up with the simplest, warmest smile that Asuka had ever seen on the young girl. As the morning sunlight finally spilled into her room, Rei looked nothing short of radiant.

"You... look wonderful when you smile," whispered Asuka, in awe.

Rei looked startled, but then the smile returned with even greater strength.

"Thankyou, Asuka," she replied.


	6. Chapter 6

**6.**

Progress. That was what she was making: progress. Rei was finally opening up and it had taken a lot less than Asuka would have ever expected.

Or at least that was how it had seemed that morning. By lunch time however, Rei was back to her usual monosyllabic self. Not that Asuka minded especially. She was sure that what had gone on since their reunion wasn't washing over Rei without effect. Little differences were already creeping into her mannerisms. For example, after rising late (it being Sunday and there being no work for Asuka to go to) they discovered the coffee utensils that had been used and not cleared away the night before. Asuka had decided – or rather, her growling stomach had decided – that food was more important, as they each hadn't eaten since breakfast on the previous day. For some reason, eating had completely slipped her mind...

Rei had then offered to clear up while Asuka prepared the food. That was the first minor difference, but also the way she had offered wasn't normal Rei. Where she would normally ask for mere confirmation of her duties, i.e. "should I clear this up?", she had instead sought an emotional response from Asuka: "would you like me to clear this up?" A small thing, maybe, but something that Asuka picked up on, nevertheless.

Of course, she remained completely silent whilst completing the task, but that wasn't anything Asuka hadn't already become accustomed to. In fact, in a way it was quite comforting...

The young redhead made sandwiches for each of them, since cooking felt a little too involved for the time of day. They ate them, mainly in silence, seated at the kotatsu as they had been the night before. Asuka couldn't help watching Rei as she ate, waves of surreal wonder kept rolling over her. It was almost unbelievable that the blue haired girl was seated before her at all.

 _How did she come back?_ wondered the redhead. _Did she choose to leave the lcl, like I did?_

Thinking back to the Instrumentality was not something she liked to do. Shinji may have allowed the world to continue, but it was Asuka who had chosen to leave the sea of souls. Remembering all the human entities crowded together, touching every part of her psyche, seeing everyone and being seen by everyone, losing the borders of her self... it was an experience the German had found horrifying. Had Rei's experience been the same as hers? Was that why she had come back?

She wanted to ask, but at the same time, she didn't think she had the strength or courage to talk about those things herself. Instead, she remained uncharacteristically quiet, even as she collected up their utensils and returned them to the kitchen, leaving Rei seated meekly at the Kotatsu.

When she passed through the entrance hall once more, Asuka noticed that the light on her answering machine was flashing. It must have been flashing since the previous day, but what with Rei's dramatic arrival, it had totally failed to register. She strode over to the phone and hit 'play message', already knowing who it would be before she depressed the plastic button.

"Asuka?" said the slightly digitalised female voice, "It's Maya..." there was a pause, "I guess you're out. I hope you've not just stopped answering your phone... Anyway, I thought we could meet up tomorrow or some time this week. I haven't seen or heard from you for a few weeks and I'm starting to get a bit worried. If you're bothered by how I was last time, I'm doing better now, I've laid off the alcohol a bit. Are you still touring cafés?"

There was another pause in which Asuka felt chagrin.

"Sorry, I guess I should have told you I know about that. I've seen you on more than one occasion, what with being in the delivery business now. Anyway, give me a call. I really want to see you, to make sure you're all right... You're the only one that's..." a third pause followed, the longest yet, then Maya finished. "Well, call me..."

The line clicked on the recording and then the answer phone informed her that there were no further messages.

"Lieutenant Ibuki..." said a voice from behind her. Asuka jumped and looked round. Rei was standing in the doorway to the living area, her expression unreadable.

"Yeah," replied Asuka, "She's been having a hard time since... well, you know. I think she had a thing for Doctor... for Ritsuko."

She supposed she would probably always remember the people that had died in Nerv by their rank or title. It was something that she would never get past.

"That woman tried to kill me."

"Maya?!" gasped Asuka. Rei shook her head. "Ritsuko..." finished the young German, suddenly understanding. And she thought she had vague recollections of what Rei was talking about, of red liquid and the edges of a white lab coat being tugged at by small currents. Another gift from the mind of Shinji... or was this from Rei herself?

"I made her sad. I made her mother sad... Now I've made Maya sad..."

"Don't say that!" cried Asuka. She lunged forward and grabbed the startled Rei, pulling her into an embrace. "We're all partly responsibility for what happened, it's not just your fault!" she whispered fiercely, tears stinging the backs of her eyes, "Stop blaming yourself for everything, or you'll get me started, too!"

Rei smiled faintly and relaxed into the hug, putting her own arms around Asuka. She rested her cheek on the redhead's shoulder.

"Holding you feels nice," she whispered, "I never –"

Asuka let go of her quickly, leaving Rei looking slightly disappointed.

"It's called hugging," replied the German, breezily. "If you want to know what it is to live, you're going to have to start using correct terms for things like that. Otherwise, you'll start causing all sorts of uncomfortable misunderstandings..."

In truth, though, they hadn't just been hugging. Asuka had let go so quickly because Rei had been right; it _had_ felt nice... Asuka wasn't used to that yet.

 _Some teacher I'm going to be_...

She turned back to the phone.

"Well, I better give her a call, I suppose," she said, picking up the receiver. She glanced at Rei. "I do have big news, after all..."

She punched Maya's number into the handset without pause. It came quickly to her mind; in truth it was one of only a very few telephone numbers Asuka had to remember since coming to Kaibyaku: Maya; the foreman at work; her landlord; a couple of her colleagues that had tried (and mostly failed) to form a friendly relationship with her outside of work... And that was it.

The line buzzed eight times, a long time for Maya. Asuka was just expecting the answering machine to pick up, but then the former lieutenant appeared on the line.

"Hello, sorry, hello!" Maya sounded out of breath, "Sorry, I was in the bathroom."

"Too much information, as usual, lieutenant," said the German.

"Asuka? I wasn't expecting to hear from you!" said Maya, sounding surprised.

"You told me to call," replied Asuka, frowning.

"Ah, that's right," replied Maya, "but since you hadn't spoken to me for ages, I wasn't sure... Well, anyway, are you all right? I've been worried about you, you know? I hope you don't hate me for the café thing, it's just –"

"Maya," Asuka broke in, "it's fine. I'm sorry I've been so closed off recently." She glanced at Rei, who was standing, looking a little awkward, in the kitchen doorway. "Look, Maya, can we meet up today... I have to talk to you about something..."

"Sure..." answered Maya, sounding anything but, "there's nothing wrong, is there?"

"Oh, no. Nothing like that."

"Okay, well, where would you like to meet? That café down on –"

"I think it would be best if we were somewhere private, rather than somewhere with lots of people. How about you come over to mine? I've got some new coffee which is really good."

"You're really worrying me now," said Maya, "this isn't about that time I was drunk and tried to kiss you, is it? I said I was sorry, I thought you'd taken that as –"

"B-Baka!" stammered Asuka, blushing at that memory, "What are you bringing that up for? Maya, would you quit worrying. I said it wasn't anything bad!"

"Okay..." replied Maya, slowly, "You have coffee, you say? Then how about I bring some groceries and cook us dinner?"

"Sounds good," smiled Asuka, "but just one thing: bring lots."

"Okay," replied Maya, sounding more confused than ever.

"See you around seven, say?"

"Sure," said Maya, "see you at seven."

Asuka hung up and heaved a sigh.

"Is Maya coming?" the voice of Rei sounded from across the hallway. Asuka looked up and smiled.

"She said she would. But this place is a mess, I haven't cleaned properly in ages. Want to help me straighten everything up before she gets here?"

Rei considered this for a moment, then nodded.

"I would... like that."

Asuka smiled at her new room-mate, who still stood a little awkwardly, staring back at her with that usual neutral expression. Sudden energy filled her.

"Right! We've got a little more than five hours before Ibuki will be here, we'd best get started!"


	7. Chapter 7

**7.**

They cleaned the apartment thoroughly, vacuuming floors, dusting surfaces. Asuka scrubbed the bath and beat the floor mats out on her modest balcony, while Rei scoured the kitchen of any grease and grime that had accumulated since Asuka had last performed that chore (which, she was ashamed to recall, wasn't since she had moved in). Rei had no real experience of proper cleaning, Asuka had been to her apartment at Nerv and been appalled at a) how dirty it was, and b) how messy Rei could let it get without actually having any possessions to cause the clutter. So the young German gave her careful instructions about what she was supposed to be doing, then left her cleaning the kitchen sink. After an hour, she decided to check on Rei's progress and was more than a little concerned to find an absolutely spotless (and veritably glowing) sink, but no other work done. When she'd entered the room, Rei had looked up from polishing the already gleaming taps, with a look almost of hope in her eyes, as if she desperately wanted to be praised for doing a good job.

Asuka had bitten her tongue (with just a _little_ difficulty) and patiently explained that Rei should be a little less thorough and a little more speedy at getting through the various jobs. After all, she reasoned to herself, Rei had never had to clean before. Gendo had obviously never thought it necessary to stress the importance of housework towards his young creations, and Rei had been absent from school so often that classroom cleaning hadn't ever been an issue for her.

 _This is all new to her_ , thought Asuka, _she's learning as she goes along, so getting angry with her wouldn't be productive in the slightest_.

Fortunately, Rei seemed to be a fast learner. When she checked again half an hour later, the blue haired girl was buried in a cupboard with a duster and some polish and had almost finished with the kitchen. And, what was more, she seemed to have done a fairly decent job of it.

They carried on cleaning the rest of the apartment, Rei dusting light fixtures, Asuka carrying out the rubbish, Rei cleaning the kotatsu, Asuka rearranging the furniture. At last, at half past six, Asuka flopped back on a chair and swiped her brow with the back of her hand. Rei stood before her, clutching a rag in her hands and looking awkward.

"Good job, today," Asuka told her, "you really got into the swing of things!"

Rei looked mightily relieved.

"Thankyou Asuka," she replied and smiled tentatively.

"Right," said Asuka standing up again, "I'll let you have a bath first."

Rei nodded.

"But don't be taking too long, Maya will be here soon, and I don't want to greet her looking like this!" She indicated her grimy face. Then she giggled. "You look like you've crawled through a dust making factory!"

She was right, Rei had smudges of dust all over her cheeks and forehead and the clothes she had been given the day before were covered also.

"You're dirty too..." Rei pointed out to Asuka.

"I guess you're right," replied the German, looking at her grubby hands and smiling. "I didn't realise how dirty I'd let this place get." She sighed happily, feeling cleansed after the work they'd done, even though she was so filthy. "Right, you," she said spinning a startled Rei around. "Bath!"

While Rei occupied the bathroom, Asuka searched for fresh clothes for her new companion (washing her hands first, of course). She left them outside the bathroom door for Rei to find when she exited, then went and flopped back down in the living room, to wait her turn. They had flung open all the windows and the cold air that wafted through the house felt fresh and wonderful to breathe in deeply, quite soon Asuka fell into a happy doze.

When she opened her eyes again, Rei stood over her, holding the fresh clothes to her stomach. Other than that, she was completely naked. Her blue hair hung in damp strands around her shoulders as she leaned forward slightly.

"Asuka?" she said quietly, "I've finished in the bath."

Asuka groaned, putting a hand to her forehead.

"You're going to have to stop walking around my home naked, you know, Ayanami?" she muttered.

Five minutes later she was in her own bath, soaking luxuriously. It was unfortunate that she had so little time, she could have easily stayed in the bath a good hour or so, but as ten-to-seven arrived she reluctantly got out and began towelling herself dry. She did so quickly, wanting to be ready before Maya arrived at seven, swiftly moving from her body to her long red hair.

As the towel buffeted the sides of her head, she failed to hear a knock at her front door. When she straightened and checked how she looked in the mirror, she did hear Rei pad past the bathroom door, but thought nothing of it. She had just begun attacking her hair again with the towel, when an ear-splitting scream made her freeze.

 _Oh my god!_ she thought. _She's seen her already!_

She wrapped the towel around her quickly and dashed out of the bathroom. This wasn't how she had planned it! Asuka had wanted time to prepare Maya for the return of the first child, to talk to her calmly on her doorstep before reintroducing the pair in her living room. Heck, it would still have been a shock, but it would surely have been better than this was undoubtedly going to be...

The scene that greeted her in her entrance hall was like a tableau from a waxwork museum. Rei stood in the middle of the hall, having retreated several steps from the doorway in shock at Maya's reaction to her. Her eyes were wide and her hands were bunched in the front of the dark blue T-shirt that Asuka had given to her to wear.

 _Well, what did you expect?_ Asuka found herself thinking, in exasperation of the blue haired girl.

Maya still stood, frozen, outside the open door. Two bags of groceries lay at her feet where she had dropped them, a single tomato had escaped and was rolling across Asuka's doorstep. Maya's hands were held to her mouth, only partially obscuring the look of terror on her features, eyes so wide Asuka thought they might drop out of her head.

The former lieutenant drew a breath, ready to scream again, but Asuka rushed past Rei and clapped her hand over Maya's mouth before she could.

"It's okay!" she cried, "Maya, it's okay, she's not here to hurt you!"

Maya shook her head violently from side to side, mumbling into the German's hand. Tears were starting in her eyes.

"Rei!" said Asuka, sharply, drawing the frightened girl's attention, "Could you go into the living room and wait for us there, please?"

The blue haired girl nodded and retreated swiftly. Her disappearance did little to ease Maya, however. She turned her terrified gaze on Asuka, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks.

"Asuka..." she breathed.

"I'm not going to hurt you, either. You're safe Maya, nothing bad is going to happen."

Maya collapsed against her, sobbing into her shoulder. Asuka put her arms around her friend and stroked her hair as she wept.

By now other people from her apartment block were appearing on the entrance gangway, attracted by the scream, each of them looking worried at the weeping woman that Asuka held. Even one or two people in the street below had stopped what they were doing and were craning their heads towards the pair.

"It's okay, she's just had some bad news," Asuka told them, "it's, er, a family member, you know?"

She pulled Maya into her apartment and closed the door, breathing a sigh of relief. Then she sat them both down on the step and held her at arms length. The tears did not lessen.

"You're going to have to get hold of yourself now, Maya," she said sternly, "I know you've had a shock, and I'd hoped you wouldn't have to, but weeping like this is not on."

The former lieutenant looked at her with tear-stained, and still slightly shocked, eyes. Asuka wasn't sure quite how compos mentis she was, but she didn't look like she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown any more, so that was a small positive. Ibuki drew a shuddering breath.

"R-Rei..." she began, "I saw Ayanami-san..."

"I know," replied Asuka, "now don't go off on one, but... she's here. She's back."

Maya drew another frightened breath.

"She's... here?"

"Yes," replied Asuka, nodding, "she's not here to do any harm, she's not here to hurt anybody, May–"

"Oh my god – Fourth Impact!" whispered Maya.

"NO!" said Asuka, forcefully. Maya looked momentarily taken aback. "No," repeated Asuka, more gently this time, "I don't think she could do that, even if she wanted to. She's just a girl now, Maya. She's just Rei."

Maya looked at her ex-colleague and her previously wild eyes gained some focus. Then she looked down.

"Asuka... did you really go outside dressed like that...?"

The young German looked down at the towel that was still wrapped around her, barely covering her various charms.

With the howl she let out, it was a wonder her neighbours didn't batter her apartment door down to save the inhabitants from being murdered.

* * *

Twenty minutes later (and having apologised profusely to her neighbours for the disturbance) a fully clothed, under control Asuka sat uncomfortably at her kotatsu. Rei sat at her left and Maya at her right, and while the former lieutenant couldn't seem to take her wide and wary eyes off the fourteen year old in front of her, Rei didn't seem to be able to look up from the hands that were clasped in her lap.

"So, that's how it is," Asuka was saying, her eyes darting from one girl to the other, "I've decided to have Rei stay here until she can get on her feet and fend for herself. We're intending to look for work for her in the next few days. I was hoping you could help with that, Maya. Maybe check to see whether anything is going at your company..."

She glanced back to Maya, who neither indicated that she had heard nor, in fact, moved in any way.

"Maya...?" said Asuka.

"Mmmm? What?" replied her friend, more than a little – well, no, really _very –_ distractedly.

"What do you think?"

"About what?"

"About everything," sighed Asuka.

"So... she's not here to remake the world?" asked Maya, tearing her eyes away from Rei's down-turned face, at last. Asuka sighed again.

"We've been through all that..."

"Well, if she's not here to start Fourth Impact, or to get revenge on all of us, then what is she here for?" said Maya, her tone of voice verging on anger.

"Why don't you ask Rei that?" replied Asuka.

She supposed that her friend's reaction was not at all unexpected, or even unjustified, but the way Maya was acting still riled Asuka, somewhat.

 _Can't she see that Rei is no danger to her, or anyone else?_ she thought to herself, _She hasn't made one threatening gesture since she arrived!_

Of course it was going to take a lot more than that to convince her, Asuka knew that. Maya had been through a lot, just as she had. It would be only natural for her to focus her feelings of anger and loss upon Rei, but Asuka also knew such vitriol would be unfair if vented upon the blue haired girl. Rei didn't pull the trigger that killed Ritsuko and she wasn't solely responsible for the remaking of the world. She might have formed the bridge between this world and the LCL, but even that wouldn't have happened without manipulation from Gendo and complicity from Shinji. Rei alone could never have caused Third Impact. Asuka had long since come to the conclusion that they were all responsible, Maya included. After all, her work could have done nothing but hasten Gendo's twisted plans and therefore the arrival of the subsequent, terrifying events.

Still, try telling that to someone who's lost the only person they ever loved because of those events.

"She killed doctor Ritsuko," said Maya, her pretty features beginning to twist of their own accord into an expression of intense dislike.

"No she did not!" cried Asuka, angrily, "Gendo did that, and you know it!"

Maya gritted her teeth and looked away. Asuka could see the beginnings of tears glistening in her eyes, but at least the hateful look had gone.

"I was not a real person," said Rei, startling Asuka and causing Maya to look back, eyes sparkling. The blue haired girl was staring at the surface of the kotatsu. "I was a fake soul born into an artificial body. One of many and none of them."

"Rei..." began Asuka.

"I was created solely for Commander Ikari's plans; to bring back his dead wife."

"You think that excuses what you did? All the people you killed?" shot Maya, bitterly.

"Maya!" warned Asuka again.

"The ones that were taken by third impact are not dead, they are in the sea of souls. The ones that are not came back."

"Not all! Not all came back! Doctor Ritsuko didn't come back, did she? She wasn't in the LCL and she didn't come back!"

"I am sorry for the ones that died, but I am not responsible for that," said Rei, suddenly looking directly at Maya. Her gaze caught the former Lieutenant like a trap. "If you wish to hate me even so... you can."

This took Maya by surprise.

" _Hate_ you?" she flustered, "It's not a matter of _hate_... I'm just saying... you don't understand..."

Asuka decided to step in.

"She doesn't hate you, Rei, but you have to understand what you represent to her. She associates you with the loss of the person she loved."

Maya opened her mouth in astonishment, but before she could speak, Asuka had turned to her.

"I know it still hurts, Maya, and I know you've had a shock, but I won't let you attack Rei because of that. We're every bit as much to blame as she is for Ritsuko's death."

Maya closed her mouth again. In her eyes, Asuka saw the hurt her last comment had caused.

"I'm sorry," she muttered, "but it's the truth."

Maya gritted her teeth and looked away, but then nodded.

"So will you help us?" asked Asuka. Maya turned and looked at her directly. Her eyes were hard.

"Even if I did, do you seriously expect to be able to take her out in public?" she asked, "If you think my reaction has been bad, it'll be ten times worse for her when there's lots of people around. They all know who she is, Asuka, just like they all know you and they all know me!"

Asuka groaned internally. How other people would react wasn't something she'd even considered. Maya was right, the collective terror of the patrons at the café yesterday was enough to prove that. People were still people, after all.

"Worst case scenario," continued Maya, "she'll get lynched. Brave new era or not." She banged the flat of her hand on the table, leaning forward. "And you and I would be nowhere _near_ enough to protect her from that."

"You would protect me?" asked Rei, a look of curious surprise filtering through the girl's usual blank expression. Maya was taken unawares and disarmed by the question.

"Well... I... I wouldn't just stand by... it's not like I'd want you to get hurt..."

Maya trailed off, looking frustrated. And, despite the gravity of the topic, Asuka found herself smothering a smile at the nature of the former lieutenant. She was still basically a good person, despite the horrors she had endured.

Asuka reached out a hand, placing it over Maya's on the table top.

"Thankyou," she said.

Maya sniffed, avoiding their eyes, but she didn't take her hand away.

"I don't like violence," she stated quietly.

"I know," smiled Asuka.

* * *

Their grumbling stomachs soon put paid to any more talk and Maya retreated to the kitchen with her groceries to cook them some food, leaving Asuka and Rei alone at the Kotatsu. They sat in an uncomfortable silence (at least it felt uncomfortable to Asuka; Rei, as always, seemed unconcerned by the lack of conversation) until Maya returned with three steaming bowls full to the brim with delicious looking ramen.

"Good job I took you at your word when you said bring lots," Maya stated as she set the tray she was carrying down and handed a bowl each to the two girls.

She sat in front of her own bowl, but rather than picking up her chopsticks, she placed her hands flat on the table on either side of her bowl and stared at it.

"I have one question," she stated. "And before you protest, Asuka –" for Asuka had indeed opened her mouth in preparation for a defensive rebuke "– I'm not going to ask why you're helping her, or how you know she's not lying, or even what you hope to achieve by taking her in." She held up a hand, as angry words bubbled up in Asuka's throat. "I'm _not_ asking you that, Asuka. But I do want to know, why did she come to you?"

She looked at Rei. A hard, direct look that brooked no evasion. Evasion was not on the blue haired girl's mind, however. She stared right back at Maya with her deep red eyes, not a trace of emotion showing on her face.

"I came to Asuka," she replied, "because she is special to me."

Asuka could feel the flush creeping on to her astonished face. She struggled to come up with a reply that didn't misinterpret the former eva pilot's words –

 _It WAS a misinterpretation, wasn't it? To take it THAT way?_

– or a reply to make light of them, or simply any kind of response at all. Unbelievably, her mouth could only work silently, not a sensible word coming out of it.

Maya, on the other hand, seemed satisfied. She nodded, curtly, and picked up her chopsticks. A moment later, she was attacking her Ramen with a will. Rei, for her part, looked down at her food, her face unreadable. Asuka couldn't think what to say.

"Eat up," said Maya, making Asuka jump, "before it gets cold."

And although she didn't look up from her food, Asuka thought she saw just the hint of a smile and an odd twinkle in Maya's eye.

* * *

The food finished, Asuka, made them all coffee (Rei's black with one sugar, Asuka's black with two and Maya's white without). The mood had eased considerably, and a small amount of conversation was managed. No further mention was made of Rei's situation, or of third impact, or of any of the hurtful events in their shared past. Eventually, Maya took the dishes out to the kitchen to wash, leaving Rei and Asuka alone at the Kotatsu. Before another uncomfortable silence could mount, Rei spoke up.

"Asuka...?"

The young German looked at her friend.

"What Maya said..." she stopped, then started again. "What you said..."

"Rei –" began Asuka, but the blue haired girl shook her head, stopping further words. She looked distressed, conflicted.

"No matter what you say, Asuka... Third Impact couldn't have happened without me... why do you... why did you agree to help me?"

"Because you asked," replied Asuka, simply.

They lapsed into a far more comfortable silence, Asuka sipping at her coffee, Rei simply staring at the surface of the Kotatsu. The German studied her friend as she drank. Was it her imagination, or was there a look of... _contentment_ on Rei's face.

Before she could decide for sure, Maya's voice floated in from the kitchen.

"Asuka? Is this a new sink?"

The redhead choked on her coffee.


	8. Chapter 8

**8.**

The shop assistant watched the three women as they walked through her store.

 _Odd_ , she thought.

They were quite the oddest trio she had seen in some time. It was her opinion that a lot of the crazies seemed to have gone on holiday since... well, _that_ time. Whether they'd somehow all returned with their psyches miraculously readjusted, or they had simply become subsumed in that strangely terrifying other-world, she didn't know, but it was her opinion that the world had become much saner and was a better place for it. She hoped to goodness that these three weren't a few nut-case-returnees, especially if they were in _her_ shop.

Well, her _boss's_ shop, anyway.

They looked a little ostentatious, even though they were obviously trying to blend in – a difficult feat in an empty shop, but what made it all the more impossible was their attire. All three wore long coats and dark berets, like something out of the cheesiest spy thriller. Two of them, the dark haired brunette and the redhead were vaguely familiar looking, even from beneath their hats and behind their dark glasses –

 _Dark glasses?_ the assistant puzzled. _It's raining outside..._

– the third, the black haired one, also looked familiar, but wrong, somehow. The assistant didn't know how that could be. She'd obviously never met her before, so how could she know she looked wrong? This one, too, wore sunglasses, a larger pair that obscured more of her face than those the other two were wearing. She was also very pale; so pale, in fact, the black hair looked almost shocking in contrast with her alabaster skin.

 _Is she a goth?_ the assistant wondered, then she thought: _Maybe they're celebrities... celebrities from before..._

She watched them as they pulled various items from the rack of clothing, appraising them against the black haired girl who stood awkwardly, not offering much help. She was young, the youngest of the three, maybe in her mid teens and it was obvious to the assistant that she would rather have been anywhere else. The redhead scolded her occasionally for her lack of input. She looked a little older, though not by much – the brunette, however, was obviously in her twenties. Under the long coat, she wore slightly more rugged clothes than the younger girls, slacks and a tough jacket with the collar up – work clothes she presumed, an assumption that was proved correct when the brunette looked across to her and she spied a courier's logo on the jacket. The woman quickly looked away again.

 _Well, if they_ are _celebrities, they're obviously down on their luck_. A bit like her store, actually. There wasn't much call for fashionable clothing these days, as was evidenced by the lack of other patrons in her shop.

Her _boss's_ shop.

Still, they must have had it tough since... then. Thinking that seemed a little stupid; they must have had it tough _before_ and _during_ , as well. Everyone had.

 _But they had it tougher than most._

For some reason that thought made her shiver.

* * *

Maya sneaked a look at the shop assistant, noting how the young woman was watching them, curiously. It had taken them almost a week to plan this excursion to buy Rei clothes, a week of careful planning, finding a store not too close to either of their apartments, but not so far as to increase the risk of Rei being spotted. They'd waited for a day when the weather was poor, so that there would be fewer people on the streets and in the shops. Maya had thought the plan well formed, but that was before Asuka's insistence on the apparel – long trench-coats, berets (and a wig for Rei) and large, movie-star style sunglasses – which was now threatening to backfire on them.

"Asuka, these 'disguises' are attracting too much attention!" she hissed.

"Don't be stupid, my disguises are perfect!" replied Asuka, haughtily. "Besides –" she pulled Maya close, "how much more attention do you think we would attract if people could see our faces!"

Rei bumped into a clothing rack, almost knocking several of the hanging garments from their hangers.

"I can't see with these on..." she mumbled, reaching automatically for the oversized sunglasses.

"Don't you dare take them off!" Asuka snapped, grabbing her hand and swiftly readjusting the black wig that had come askew, revealing a few strands of the blue hair hidden beneath.

"But..." began Rei, unhappily.

"No buts, you'll cause a riot if you take those off!"

"Can I help?" called the assistant from the counter on the other side of the small shop. Asuka turned a pleasant smile on the woman.

"No, thank you, we're just browsing."

"Do you need any assistance with different sizes?"

"No no, we're fine, thank you."

"Can I show you to the changing rooms in case you want to try items on before you buy?"

"Oh, no, thank you very much, we should be fine!"

The smile on Asuka's face was becoming decidedly fixed as the questions continued. Beside her, Rei tripped over a display and disappeared among the coats that hung upon it.

"No, really, we're fine," continued Asuka.

"Are you sure?" replied the assistant, craning her neck to see where the young girl had gone.

 _Why won't she leave us alone?_ wondered Maya. Then with a sick feeling; _Maybe she thinks we're criminals..._

* * *

 _Maybe they're criminals!_ thought the assistant with a sudden thrill of fear. _Criminals in my_ (boss's) _shop! Should I call for help? Call the police?_

Her unease grew as the redhead pulled six or seven items, apparently at random, from the shelves and stalked towards the counter. Almost subconsciously, she shrank back as the girl approached. Behind the redhead, the brunette was extricating the perhaps-goth from the display.

Was it her imagination, or had her hair changed colour?

"We'll get these for now," said the redhead, slapping the mismatched clothes down on the counter, snapping the assistant's focus back to serving.

"R-Right, okay madam, one moment please."

She began scanning the clothing, ringing up the items on the till beside her. In her haste, the redhead had unwittingly picked up some pretty high priced garments, it seemed. She grimaced as she read the total on the till display.

"I... I don't have enough..." she mumbled as she sorted through her purse.

"Would you like to put some items back?" asked the assistant, nervously.

The brunette strode forward.

"I'll cover it," she said, pulling cash from her own purse. Behind her, the goth trailed towards the counter. Her hair had returned to its original black colour, but the dark glasses had vanished.

And she looked terrifyingly familiar. Suddenly, she knew why the hair looked wrong. Black wasn't the original colour at all.

"I know you!" squeaked the attendant, backing away. Her back hit the wall behind the counter with a thud.

"Rei, your glasses!" gasped the redhead, looking round.

 _Rei!_ That Rei, the one from... _her_... but... it _couldn't_ be!

"No!"

The simple denial slipped from the attendants lips as an anguished moan, but it didn't change what she was seeing – couldn't change it. She was _real_.

"No, please, no!"

* * *

At Asuka's exclamation, Rei raised a hand and touched her face, mild surprise on her features. She lifted her eyes to Asuka.

"They must have... when I fell..."

She turned away, starting to walk back to the rack of disturbed clothing, but Asuka caught her arm. Her face was pale and she was staring at the shop assistant, who had backed up against the far wall and for some reason was moaning as if she was in pain.

"Forget them, Rei. We have to go, now!"

The young German yanked her back round, pulling her swiftly towards the exit. Rei looked back and saw Maya throw down a bundle of notes and gather the clothes from the counter.

"That should cover the bill," she told the assistant, "keep the change."

The assistant seemed incapable of replying as they left the shop.

* * *

For several moments after they had gone, the assistant remained frozen, her back pressed against the wall. Then, all of a sudden, her knees gave and she sank down to the floor, sobs beginning to rack her as the numbness of shock ebbed.

 _The monster... I saw the monster._

Why had she been here? Why had she just left? Was the world going to end for a second time?

"I don't want to go back to _that place_ ," she choked. Then a thought struck her.

 _Nobody knows..._

Somebody had to stop her, catch her, _kill_ her... but if she was the only one who knew...

Pushing herself onto her knees, she groped on the counter top for the phone that sat there, spilling it down into her hands. With shaking fingers, she punched the digit for an outside line.


	9. Chapter 9

**9.**

Ten minutes later, the trio were safely ensconced in Maya's car, parked by the side of the road a short walk from the store they had just fled. Raindrops drummed on the roof and bonnet, a kind of white noise that made constructive thinking very difficult. Rei sat in the back of the car, her head bowed. Asuka occupied the passenger seat and Maya, the driver's. Her fingers were nervously drumming on the steering wheel, almost as fast as the rain on the top of the car.

"You understand now?" she asked, the question was for Asuka, but it was directed at nobody in particular. The redhead looked away, out into the rain steeped street.

"Of course I understand, I understood before we set off."

"She'll get that reception wherever she goes."

Asuka glanced over her shoulder. Rei hadn't raised her head once since they had climbed into the car, panting and dripping wet from their flight through the rain. The blue haired girl still wore the black wig, though it was tousled and damp, but her dark glasses, the ones Asuka had insisted she wear at all times, were conspicuous by their absence.

"Well, what would you have us do?" she asked the former lieutenant. "She can't stay hidden in my apartment for the rest of her life!"

Maya looked at her hard for a moment.

"The damage has been done, I suppose. No doubt that shop assistant will cause a stir for a while, but if we keep a low profile, and keep Rei out of sight, it should quieten down soon enough. Only one person saw her, everyone else will just think the poor girl's lost her mind."

A sick feeling hit Asuka in the pit of her stomach.

"She isn't the only one."

"What do you mean?" asked Maya.

"When Rei arrived... I was at a café. She walked in and gave me a shock. Everyone saw her... _everyone_ in the café..."

"How many?"

"Twenty... maybe thirty..."

Maya hissed her frustration. She glanced in her rear view mirror. Thirty metres behind them, a police car pulled up outside the shop they had entered. It's lights were flashing, but they had heard no siren.

"Well for now we should get out of here. We'll go to my place, I'm less well known than you two, maybe the assistant didn't recognise me."

"They'll put it together," replied Asuka, "there aren't many from Nerv left. All they'll have to do is check the service records against the assistant's story and they'll come up with you."

"But they'll come up with _you_ first," replied Maya, turning the key in the ignition. "That'll give us some time." She looked in her mirror again. Two policemen had exited the car and were entering the shop. They looked tense, but they weren't running.

 _Not running is good,_ she thought, _not great, but good enough for now._

She let the handbrake go and accelerated away into the haze.

* * *

They drove through the rain swept streets of Kaibyaku for what seemed like an age, before finally arriving at Maya's apartment block. The road was empty as they hurried from the car to the lobby of the building, perhaps unsurprising given the conditions, but welcome nevertheless.

The lobby itself was almost as deserted. The building manager sat behind his desk staring blankly at a TV screen showing reruns of a very old comedy. The only other occupant was a middle-aged lady sitting in the reception area reading a dog-eared book. The dripping umbrella that leant against her chair suggested she was only here to shelter from the rain outside. Neither one of them paid the trio any mind as they moved to the elevators and pressed the call button.

"I hope you've got the heating on in your apartment," grumbled Asuka. She had removed her sunglasses and her now sodden beret and was absently wrapping one inside the other. Rei stood obediently alongside, head down, face covered by the long black hair of the wig she was still wearing.

Maya considered pointing out that heating was the least of their worries, but seeing how downcast the other two looked, she decided against it.

The elevator pinged and slid open and they all stepped inside. The doors closed again behind them, shutting them away from the lobby. Maya hit the button for the thirteenth floor

"What are we going to do?" asked Asuka as the elevator began to ascend.

"Not here," replied Maya, "when we get up to my apartment we'll work something out, but not here."

She looked up, noticing the camera in the corner of the elevator. A glance at Rei told her she needn't worry about her being caught on camera; she didn't look like she would be raising her eyes from the floor any time soon.

 _Poor girl. How much bad stuff has to happen to her?_

Realising what she was thinking, Maya gave herself a mental shake. Even if it was true, she hadn't the luxury of sympathy at the moment. That 'poor girl' had just turned her life upside down. Again. And now she had to find a way to right it.

 _Oh, Ritsuko,_ she thought absently, _what would you do if you were here? No doubt you'd have a solution... If only..._

Stupid. _Stupid!_ What good would that do her, thinking about things past and gone? She had to help _herself_. And, yes, those two children too. It was her responsibility now.

Even so, the emotions she had bound to Ritsuko, the ones that came rushing unbidden at such thoughts, hurt terribly, even after a year of rebuilding her life.

The doors swished open and Maya led them through the corridors to her apartment.

"I'm still amazed you got such a great place," said Asuka, gazing about as they entered. She had been to Maya's only a couple of times since they'd both been assigned apartments in the new city, and each time she'd marvelled at the spacious rooms (relatively – certainly compared to her own) and the clean, tasteful, almost chic furnishings.

"An old school friend of mine is on the Kaibyaku emergency housing committee," replied Maya with a shrug and a tired and half-apologetic grin. "I didn't even realise until she placed me here. I need a drink."

The former lieutenant disappeared into her kitchen and they heard cans cracking and drinks being poured. Asuka looked down at Rei who had sat meekly down on a short sofa. The girl had removed the black wig (it lay in a tangle at her side), but she still wouldn't look up.

"Asuka..." she said, quietly, "I'm sorry. The glasses..."

"It's done, Rei, there's no point going over it."

"I'm sorry..." the girl repeated. "Because of me they'll come looking for you, won't they? Perhaps I should go away and –"

"And what?" said Asuka, breaking off whatever her new friend was going to say. She folded her arms and looked down at the girl. "Rei, I said I'd help you, I'm not going back on that now. Who do you think I am?"

The blue haired girl looked up at last, surprised.

"But..."

Asuka just glared at her, hotly. The surprise melted into a weak smile, but the worry was still plain on her face.

"... Thank you Asuka..."

"Sorry, I couldn't find any snacks," said Maya, reappearing from the kitchen with a tray of drinks, "I haven't been shopping for a few days and I wasn't expecting guests."

"Snacks?" arched Asuka, accepting a glass. "We're not school kids, you know, Maya."

"But I like them," replied Maya, looking hurt.

Asuka sighed as Maya handed another glass to Rei, who accepted it without comment.

"Yes, well, the less said about that, the better..." Asuka was pleased to see that the glasses only contained soft drinks. It seemed Maya was telling the truth about cutting back on the alcohol. She took a sip and then set it down on Maya's kotatsu. "So then... what do we do?"

Maya looked at her, seriously. Suddenly she was every bit the former lieutenant: efficient and well prepared.

"The way I see it, we have a few options. One: we lay low in the city, and hope no one comes looking for us."

A grimace passed across the young German's face. She obviously didn't like the idea.

"Lay low where? I don't have any secret hideout and the authorities are bound to come to both of our apartments. If they search either of our places while Rei's there..."

"I agree it's high risk," replied Maya, "but you may not like the alternatives."

Asuka was brought up short. She eyed her compatriot warily.

"Which are?"

"Two:" continued Maya, "we go to the authorities voluntarily."

Asuka's eyes looked like they were about to fall out of her head. Even Rei looked up, in considerable surprise.

"You mean turn Rei in? Are you insane!?"

"If we take Rei to the authorities ourselves, perhaps we'll be able to convince them that she is no threat –"

But Asuka was already shaking her head.

"They'll arrest her! Worse, they might take her away somewhere! Do experiments! Some sick people might even decide to start researching the Angels again!"

Maya tried to sound reasonable.

"Asuka, we can't expect the worst of all people just because of what happened to us. Things have changed –"

"They haven't changed so much, Maya, you saw the way that assistant looked at her! No! No way! I'm not letting them tear Rei apart again." The redhead's ire was up in a way that it hadn't been for some time. She actually took a threatening step towards Maya, shoulders hunching with rage. "Give me option three, right now, or so help me I'll –"

"Fine!" snapped Maya, clapping a hand to her forehead and closing her eyes, "I get it Asuka, don't go all angry eva-pilot on me. I'm just giving you our options."

Asuka was silenced, but she glared away at nothing in particular. Finally she apologised.

"... Sorry..."

Maya looked at the girl. She was sullen, a child again, but at least there was some contrition in her apology.

"Our third option is that we leave."

The words hung in the air for a while.

"Leave?" asked Asuka after a time. All of the anger had drained out of her voice.

"Leave Kaibyaku and find somewhere else away from here to live. We'd not necessarily be any better off, of course. Latest estimates suggest that only one eighth of the world's population post second impact returned from instrumentality. Even if the red seas have gone and flora and fauna are returning, it will be some time before anything more than the shakiest of ecosystems will have formed. Infrastructure outside of cities like Kaibyaku will likely have collapsed and who knows what that will have done to the people. If you think the people of Kaibyaku will react badly to Rei, that reaction might well be magnified outside its borders."

Asuka flopped into a chair, thinking hard and chewing on her lip.

"Unless we go to another city, perhaps?" continued Maya. "Maybe find people we once knew at Nerv? Or maybe your friends Toji and Hikari?"

"I don't know where they went," replied Asuka, looking glum, "I don't think they wanted to be around me... I can't say I blame them..."

"Shinji," said Rei, suddenly. Asuka and Maya both looked at her, startled.

"Well, maybe..." conceded Maya, "but we don't know where he is..."

"I do," replied Rei. The look on her face told its own story.


	10. Chapter 10

**10.**

Police Captain Saburou Koga sat at his desk, staring at the reports and growing more irritated by the passing moment. He had just spent nearly two hours with an almost incoherent witness who claimed to have seen the monster from third impact. It was obvious that the girl was scared witless, but her story didn't make much sense, and neither did the footage taken from the shop's security cameras. They showed three very oddly dressed females, apparently buying perfectly ordinary (albeit fairly pricey) clothing.

Without the footage, Koga would have been inclined to dismiss her testimony as hysterical fantasy. With it, he would have thought it some kind of elaborate practical joke, at the assistant's, or perhaps even at his own police department's expense. There were many out there who had not forgiven Nerv, or SEELE, or the UN, or the JSDF for the catastrophe they had been party to, and who may now view any such organisation with distrust, even a public organisation like the police. It was not beyond the realms of possibility that such individuals might attempt to embarrass or wrong-foot the police, or the fledgling council that served the city. In that scenario, it was even possible that the hysterical assistant was a part of the hoax...

But that wasn't taking into account a café load of unconnected eye witnesses, all claiming to have come face to face with the first child.

Some form of mass hysteria? It was possible – hell, _anything_ seemed possible these days – but Koga didn't think so. These people had seen _something_. What it was, he didn't know, but he wasn't yet ready to accept that the one who had so nearly destroyed the world had returned.

One thing was for sure, his workload had tripled since the café incident. It had taken a day and a half to process the statements of those present in the café for Ayanami Rei's dramatic reappearance, and a further three days to work through them all, getting a complete picture of what had happened. Some of the witnesses claimed the apparition had kidnapped a patron and spirited them away. Others said there had been a violent confrontation, before the first child had fled. Then there were the ones that said the second child had been waiting for a clandestine meeting (in a busy cafe, if that could be believed!), and one man had even claimed to seeing Rei Ayanami performing magic, levitating and throwing chairs around.

Koga was good at his job and instinctively knew which statements to disregard and which to compare to others, but it had still taken a long time to get on top of just what had gone on – which apparently hadn't been much. Rei Ayanami, or someone who looked like Rei Ayanami, had arrived, had met with another patron (likely Asuka Langley Sohryu) and had left again with the patron in tow. He had just got to the point where he was thinking of paying the young German a visit with his partner – and plenty of ammo for their service revolvers, just in case.

And then this. The shop assistant had turned the case from an odd anomaly into a series of related incidents, the beginnings of a pattern. Patterns were meat and drink to people like Koga, and yet this one was particularly unattractive to him.

 _She couldn't have returned, surely?_

"I dropped the girl off at a friend's," said a voice from behind him. Koga looked up into the face of his partner, Suzuki. The man had an honest, open face and was young, only just half Koga's age at twenty-six, with a full head of dark hair, where Koga's was receding.

Not that he was jealous of that.

"She was still pretty shaken up, but her friend promised to look after her."

"Good," replied Koga, automatically, turning back to his work and the security footage on the monitor in front of him.

Suzuki pulled the chair over from his desk and sat down next to Koga.

"You think she's come back?"

"What do you think?" asked Koga, fast forwarding the footage. Suzuki shrugged.

"That attendant was clearly terrified."

Koga looked at him. He was a good man, enthusiastic and intelligent, though very green with it. He hadn't been a policeman long, certainly not since before third impact, but his work ethic and quick brain had allowed him to progress quickly to Sergeant in the investigative branch. That and the fact that nobody else seemed to want to work for a policing body any more. The apathetic view the public had to his job didn't bother Koga. Somebody had to do the work...

"Her testimony is also consistent with the security footage," continued Suzuki. "It seems a strange thing for the first child to do, though: go around clothes shops terrifying clerks..."

"Perhaps we're just supposed to think the first child has returned," replied Koga.

"The footage suggests they're trying to go incognito."

Koga snorted and waved a hand at the screen, upon which three girls were dressed in trench-coats, berets and dark glasses. If two of them were supposed to be Rei Ayanami and Asuka Langley Sohryu, the other was likely Maya Ibuki, the only other personal acquaintance of Rei Ayanami known to be in the city. They also looked ridiculous.

"Nobody in their right mind would dress that suspiciously if they wanted to avoid attention! It's a prank, has to be. This poor girl was just hoodwinked by some pranksters."

Suzuki shrugged.

"It's a pretty sick joke if it is." He picked up a file from his desk and handed it to Koga. "It's also a very elaborate one. Look at the colour of their hair. Brunette, Red and Dark. Now check the file photos."

Koga flipped through the folder holding the three Nerv personnel files until he reached photos of Rei Ayanami, Asuka Sohryu and Maya Ibuki. He knew what he would find as he'd already done this himself, but there they were again, just as confirmation.

"We know the dark hair is a wig, covering hair that's blue underneath, which means they fit the photos perfectly. Brown hair is common, but red isn't, and blue... Well, what are the chances of such a group of females that _aren't_ those three being together in this city? Pretty slim, I'd say."

"They could be wigs as well..."

"Which would mean the Ayanami lookalike was wearing a wig over a wig. Why? If you're going to prank someone, why not just wear the blue wig and have done with it? Why cover it up?"

Koga knew all of this himself – he'd already come to these conclusions, but hearing his partner repeat them was important to him to confirm their validity. That didn't mean this was Rei Ayanami, however.

"Even if it is them, what could they possibly gain from frightening a shop assistant?" he asked.

"I don't know..." admitted Suzuki. "We could go and interview Miss Sohryu or Miss Ibuki?"

"I'm not ready to do that yet," said Koga. "I'm not ready to rake over all those old memories and start opening old wounds. Especially if this _is_ a prank."

And he was in no rush to meet with Rei if it was not.

A voice cut short any further debate.

"Captain?"

Koga looked up and found a junior officer standing by his desk. The lad was young and obviously nervous, perhaps even a little embarrassed.

"What is it?" Koga asked him.

"Sir, there's a lady at reception who says she's seen... well..."

Koga and Suzuki exchanged glances.

"A monster?" asked Koga. The man flushed, but nodded.

"Fine. Suzuki, you're with me for this."

The younger man stood and grinned.

"Let's get going!"

* * *

When they reached the reception area of the police station, they found the desk clerk being berated by a woman who looked to be in her late forties or early fifties, around about Koga's age, he thought. She was railing at the clerk for being unhelpful, or unbelieving, or perhaps both, as she seemed to keep changing tack faster than the clerk could follow. Having said that, she did not seem to have lost possession of her faculties and was as lucid as the next person. The lady clutched a dog-eared and slightly damp novel in one hand and there was a dripping umbrella tucked under the other arm. She had obviously just come in from the rain.

"You don't understand," she was telling the desk clerk in angry tones, "I _saw_ her, she's come back from the dead. We have to inform the relevant authorities!"

"Please madam, could you keep your voice down. People don't come back from the dead."

"Don't give me that," snapped the woman, "after we all did pretty much the same thing."

The clerk blanched, clearly upset by the memory.

"That's different, if you –"

Koga broke into their debate, drawing their attention.

"I'll take it from here, Shin-chan," he told the clerk. "Please madam, could you come this way."

"Who are you?" asked the woman suspiciously, showing no signs of complying with his request.

"Police Captain Saburou Koga. This is Sergeant Kuro Suzuki. I understand you have information for us regarding Rei Ayanami."

This caught her full attention.

"Yes," she said, made a little uncertain by his directness. The uncertainty was fleeting however. "Yes. I saw Rei-chan, not two hours ago."

"Then I would be very interested to hear what you have to say," Koga told her. "If you would please follow me..."

This time, the woman followed as he moved away. He took her out of the reception area and upstairs to the interview rooms. Behind him, the woman sneezed into a damp tissue pulled from one of her pockets.

"Are you okay, miss..."

"Naoko. Mizuho Naoko."

"Miss Mizuho –"

"Naoko is fine," said the woman, irritably, "besides, I'm married." She sniffed, rubbing her nose with the tissue.

"My apologies, Naoko-san," replied Koga, "are you all right?"

"I walked and ran here through the rain," replied the woman, "I've got a sniffle, that's all."

"Maybe the damp's given you a cold," ventured Suzuki, "perhaps I could get you some hot tea?"

The woman gave a derisive snort.

"Oh, please, I thought myths like that had died out long ago! You can't catch a cold from getting wet!"

"Oh... r-really?" replied Suzuki, turning a helpless look on Koga.

"I ought to know, I used to be a biologist, after all, and a human biologist at that, I could teach you a few things about physiology they never tell you at your academies," replied the woman, "but some tea would be acceptable." Suzuki just gaped at her sudden change of direction. "Hurry along then!" she snapped at him.

"R-right!"

Koga grinned.

"I'll have some, too," he told his protégé, "bring it to interview room three."

The younger man nodded and left them. They continued the short distance to the interview room and then Koga held the door as she passed inside.

"Have a seat," he told her. After glancing warily around the spartan room, which was bare save for a table and four chairs, she did so. Then she looked up into the corner of the room, spotting the discreet camera that hung from the ceiling there.

"Are you recording this?" she asked.

"I can turn the cameras off if it makes you more comfortable?" offered Koga.

"It makes no difference to me," harrumphed the woman. "There were cameras everywhere where I used to work."

"At Nerv?" asked Koga. She really did look surprised this time, but then she grinned.

"You're good. How did you guess?"

"You said you used to be a human biologist," replied Koga, smiling, "there wouldn't be much call for such a scientist in the new Tokyo area unless you were attached to Nerv. Plus you referred to Miss Ayanami as 'Rei-chan', suggesting a personal involvement with her."

Naoko nodded.

"I met her a few times, though I doubt she would remember me. My department was mainly theoretical and didn't cross much with Doctor Ritsuko. She was always much more 'hands on' than I was."

"I see," replied Koga, sobering at that. He knew about Doctor Akagi and what had befallen her.

The door to the interview room opened and Suzuki entered, carrying a tray of drinks. He set it on the table then handed one of the steaming beverages to Naoko.

"Here you go, that'll warm you right up. Can't say much for the taste, though..."

He grinned at the woman, who didn't even smile in reply. She drank deeply, however and made a contented sound as Suzuki took a seat next to Koga.

"So, first things first," said the Captain. "Why have you come to us?

"You're the police aren't you?" she replied, looking up in mild surprise.

"What I mean to say is that most people don't have a lot of faith in the public bodies these days."

Naoko snorted.

"What's the point of blaming the police for third impact? You might as well say the angels were brought down on us by the train drivers. You people still want to protect the citizens don't you, or have things changed?"

"No," conceded Koga, "things haven't changed that much."

Naoko sat forward and tapped a finger on the table top.

"It's the governments we should be keeping an eye on," she told them, "like the council and this emergency housing committee. Who are they a front for?"

Koga and Suzuki exchanged glances.

"You know, some people say the Police are merely enforcers for the government," attempted Suzuki. That received short shrift from Naoko, though.

"Now you're sounding like a hippy."

"Ouch!" said Suzuki, rubbing his forehead, ruefully.

"You know we have to report to higher authorities," said Koga. "What makes you think any clandestine organisation wouldn't get word of this?"

"Because you're both detectives. It's your job to find the truth – if you're any good at your job, that is, and I think you are. You wouldn't risk anything that might obscure that truth."

"Well, thank you, I suppose," replied Koga.

"Besides, it doesn't matter who knows about it. It's far more dangerous for Rei-chan to be running around rogue, especially if she's capable of the things we saw during third impact!"

That received silence for a few moments.

"Would you mind telling us: where did you see her?" asked Suzuki, sitting forward himself.

"In the lobby of my apartment complex. Miss Ibuki lives there too. Apparently, the Emergency Housing Committee put most of the Nerv survivors in the same complex. Obviously, they want to keep an eye on us... Miss Ibuki's apartment is a floor below mine. I'm guessing that's where she was taking Rei-chan. And that Asuka girl as well."

"Why were you in the lobby?"

"I had workmen in my apartment," answered Naoko. "The electrics are shoddy. I'd been out most of the day with the intent of leaving them to it, but when I got back they hadn't finished, so I sat in the lobby and read my book."

"Can your husband corroborate this?" asked Suzuki. She glared at him.

"He hasn't had that ability since third impact."

Suzuki looked a little unsteadied by this blunt statement. He started stuttering apologies, but Koga cleared his throat, overriding him.

"And you're sure it was Rei Ayanami?" he asked. "It couldn't have been someone else, a lookalike, or someone wearing a blue wig."

"She was wearing a wig, all right, but it wasn't blue," replied Naoko. "It was Rei-chan, I know it. I'd recognise her anywhere."

Koga sat back, defeated.

* * *

Half an hour later, having taken a statement from the woman and arranged transport to an acquaintance's apartment, Koga and Suzuki were once again left alone at the Captain's desk.

"Well?" asked Suzuki. The expectation was evident in the tone of his voice. Koga looked at him for a moment, then sighed.

"Fine, bring the car around. We'll go bring Miss Ibuki in."


	11. Chapter 11

**11.**

"They're here," murmured Rei.

She was looking out of the window down into the rainy street below. Maya dropped her bag and crossed the room quickly to her side. Rei pointed. Two cars, unmarked, had just pulled up to the front of her apartment block. She watched as three men in suits exited each car, crossed the side-walk and passed out of her sight and into the building.

 _Plain clothes police, most likely,_ she thought. She considered the bulges she had seen, that could only be concealed weapons, at the hip and ankle of each man. _More guns. What is humanity's fascination with guns?_

"We have to leave," said Maya.

"Already?" asked Asuka. The young German was throwing the clothes they had purchased at the shop earlier into two medium sized travel-bags, along with more clothes that Maya had collected.

"They're on their way up," replied Maya, picking up her own bag (containing mainly food and a few other useful items). Asuka zipped up the bags and handed one to Rei, who slung it over her shoulder without a word.

"How do we get out?" Asuka asked, "They'll be in the lobby and covering the stairs..."

"The roof," replied Maya.

"Do you have any kind of protection, a side arm, or...?" the German trailed off at the look on Maya's face.

"No."

"But what if they start shooting?" pressed Asuka, "How do we defend ourselves?"

"I don't keep guns," replied Maya, "and I won't use them either."

She moved to the door and opened it. Checking the hallway was clear she motioned for the other two to follow her. The bank of elevators stood to their right and already the lights were showing the lifts travelling upwards. All three of them.

"Stairs," said Maya, indicating to take a left. They moved swiftly down the corridor and passed through another door leading to the inner stairwell. A quick glance down the central well revealed shadows that could only be more plain clothes police – many floors below, but moving steadily up towards them.

She leaned back and looked at Asuka and Rei.

"Go," she whispered, pointing up the stairs. "Quickly!"

They moved as fast as they could, hugging the walls so their pursuers wouldn't catch sight of them. Three quarters of the way to the roof, however, there was a commotion below.

"They must have reached your apartment and found it empty," said Asuka.

Maya risked a glance down the well again and instantly regretted it. A man in dark glasses was looking up at her from about five floors down. As she jerked back, Maya heard shouts from below.

"Crap!" she muttered. The time for quiet was officially over. "Run!" she said. And they did, pounding up the steps.

They were soon out of breath, weighed down as they were, but they soldiered on, bursting through an emergency exit, out onto the rain-slicked rooftop. The rain itself had slackened to a light drizzle, but the night air was cold.

"This way!" gasped Maya, her ragged breath misting in the night.

They pelted to the edge of the roof and stopped, looking down. Perhaps fifteen feet below, across a six foot gap, the roof of the next building awaited them.

"We have to jump down," Maya told them.

That didn't go down well.

"What?!" cried Asuka, "Are you crazy?"

"We can make it," replied Maya, "we have to."

"Rei isn't fit for that! _None_ of us are, we'll break our necks!"

"I can do it, Pilot Soryuu," said Rei, falling back into her old ways as she studied the gap.

"It's either that, or go along with those men," said Maya, throwing their bags onto the lower roof, "which would you prefer?"

As if to punctuate her speech, the door to the roof burst open and four men piled through. They started yelling all at once. Asuka took one look back, then gritted her teeth and jumped.

"DAMNIT!" she yelled as she fell. She cleared the gap easily, but the force of the landing was jarring, even though she bent her knees and rolled to lessen the impact going through her legs. With a grunt of pain, she looked up in time to see Rei leap. Instinctively, Asuka pushed herself to her feet to try to catch her. Rei crashed into her and they fell in a tangle. They struggled to extricate themselves.

Back on the upper roof, Maya turned to her pursuers. They were edging towards her, spreading out and aiming pistols at her. They all looked the same; same suits, same dark glasses, same _haircuts_ even. Were these really policemen?

"Don't do it, Miss Ibuki," one of the men said to her, holding a hand out to Maya, even while he still pointed his gun.

"Are we really back to this so quickly?" Maya spat. Then she turned and hurled herself from the roof.

* * *

Two minutes later, the trio were sprinting along metal gangways and clattering down metal staircases that dropped into the blackness of the alley behind the two large buildings. These alleys were a warren, Maya knew, with multiple entrances and exits. Even with ten men it would be difficult to cover them all, and they'd left four of them on the rooftop behind them. Hopefully.

That meant even if the two cars had carried its maximum number of occupants, there were at most six pursuers on the ground. Their odds of slipping away were good.

But then what?

They'd already chosen their point of egress from Kaibyaku, but they were a long way from the city limits with no transport. They might be able to steal a car, but the roads would likely be watched, as would public transport. That left trekking on foot and that would take time.

And even if they got out of the city their travails wouldn't be over. According to Rei it had taken weeks to reach Kaibyaku from Shinji's location, across open countryside.

No, the best thing to do, Maya decided, was to make for the refugee allocated section of the city. All cities had their run-down, or slum-like areas and Kaibyaku was no different. A steady stream of humanity flowed into the city from the countryside even now, and they had to be housed somewhere. The camps that had initially been set up to process the refugees in order to allocate the ever more needed housing had quickly grown and sprawled and now an area the size of old Shibuya had turned into a shanty town. New housing was always being built and the slums wouldn't be there forever, but for now it was the perfect place to disappear while they planned their journey to reach Shinji.

They made the ground and Maya looked quickly back and forth along the alley. There was no sign of suited men with guns, but that would surely soon change. They'd done well to make it this far. Now if only their luck would hold.

"This way," she told the two former Eva pilots.

They ran as fast as their tiring limbs would allow down the alley then took a right, followed by a left. The exit was ahead, but it was blocked. A suit with a pistol spotted them almost immediately. He barked into a walky-talky and raised his gun. Maya gritted her teeth as they skidded to a halt.

"Follow me!" she said and they dived down another alleyway to their right. After another right and a left, they found their way blocked once more.

"Damnit!" yelled Asuka, "it's like they know where we're going!"

"This way!" cried Maya.

They backtracked and went right, two more men were there with flashlights. They went left and right again. Another suit played torch-light across them. He yelled something.

"How many are there!" gasped Rei.

Two more were running up the alleyway to the left. There were more now than there should be. With a sinking feeling, Maya realised that whoever these men were, they must have brought backup. They could have the whole block surrounded for all she knew. The only saving grace was that they seemed not to want to use their firearms.

Maya cursed and pulled them through a doorway. It turned out to be a kitchen. They crashed through, startling the chefs and helpers. Then they passed into an empty cafeteria, a lobby, cleaners' quarters and out into the night again by a tradesman's exit.

Glancing quickly around to get her bearings, Maya saw that they were close to the street again. This time, however, she couldn't see any suits. Had they caught a break?

Something was on the street at the end of the alley, something bulky and dark. Probably a vehicle of some kind. It was much too large to be a car, maybe it was a delivery truck or a lorry.

Shouts came from behind them through the closed door and more from deeper into the block at the other end of the alley. They had no choice. Perhaps the vehicle could provide some cover, or maybe they could hot-wire it and escape.

"Come on," she said, pulling them along.

They sprinted for the entrance.

Half way there, sudden blinding light illuminated them. The bulky vehicle was pointing into the alleyway, shining its headlights directly at them. Unable to see, they stumbled to a halt. Shadows flitted across the headlights and a man shouted.

"Halt!"

More shouts came from behind. They were trapped. It was over – over so soon.

"So much for our grand flight from Kaibyaku," muttered Asuka at her side.

Maya strained to see who was at the end of the alleyway. Two suits knelt and held pistols, aimed steadily at the trio. Another figure stood between them, wearing a long trenchcoat. Maya couldn't make out a face, as the figure was backlit.

"Lower your guns," said a voice, "they're not a threat to you."

The two men holstered their pistols and stood up, flanking the third figure.

"Who are you?" she called.

"A friend," replied the figure, "I have a proposition for you."

"What proposition?" replied Asuka, squinting as well against the light, "show your face."

The figure raised a hand and the headlights dipped. She stepped forward.

"I'd like you to come and work for me again."

Maya's eyes widened. At her side, Asuka gasped.

" _Misato_...?"


	12. Chapter 12

**12**.

The atmosphere inside the command vehicle was charged, as it rolled along the empty streets of Kaibyaku. On one side of the cramped interior, Asuka, Rei and Maya sat. Facing them, arms folded and eyes closed, flanked by two soldiers carrying rifles, was Misato. One eyebrow ticked still with annoyance at their reunion in the alley. Asuka, apparently having regained all of her former fire, had torn strips off their old commander for nearly getting them killed chasing them, and for scaring them, and for her minions (she actually used the word 'minions' for the agents that were returning to their unmarked cars and driving off into the night) carrying guns with the apparent intention of using them. Misato had borne the tirade patiently to start with, but had eventually snapped, telling Asuka it was her own fault for twice causing a public scene that had forced her hand. She had no choice, she told the fuming German, but to come and pick her up before the police did, or before the trio could flee the city. She hadn't expected them to try something as reckless as a rooftop escape.

Maya had wondered at the time why Misato had felt the need to interfere at all, but, with the fireworks going on between them, she hadn't thought it an appropriate (or particularly safe) time to ask. She did ask what Misato had meant by 'working' for her again, but had only received a cryptic reply about them having to see for themselves. Maya hadn't liked the sound of that.

Somehow that had progressed to them agreeing to a trip in the command vehicle to see whatever it was Misato wanted them to see. Further questions from either Asuka or Maya had been met with a wall of silence and a persistent annoyed face, so instead they all sat in uncomfortable silence as the vehicle rolled on towards its unknown destination.

Fortunately it wasn't a particularly long journey. Within half an hour, the command truck was rocking on its axles as it came to a halt. Misato's eyes snapped open as the rear door hissed open, easing down to form a ramp. The soldiers were quickly up and out, taking up positions either side of the command vehicle.

"We're here," Misato told them, standing up.

"Where's here?" asked Maya. All she received was an enigmatic smile as Misato turned on her heel and stepped out. After an exchange of looks, the trio followed.

They emerged into what looked like a small hangar, with steel floors and walls. Looking back, she saw the heavy truck had entered this space via a sloping tunnel, so they were obviously below ground level. There were no other vehicles present, however, but all the same the large space gave Maya an ominous feeling.

"This way," Misato told them, stepping towards a gated exit. "We don't have the kind of space that we had at Nerv headquarters, but it's perfectly adequate for our present needs."

"What needs?" asked Asuka. "What's going on, Misato?"

"This is a military facility," said Maya, through teeth gritted with apprehension, "why is there a military facility in Kaibyaku?"

Misato had reached the gate and she pushed a security card into the slot in the gate.

"I don't have all the answers to your questions," she told them, "I've only been here a few weeks myself, but what's most important is that I tell you that things have changed. Things have been set in motion that threaten the new world that we are creating here. Shinji's world."

"We're in danger again?" asked Asuka, the colour draining from her face.

Misato paused for a long time before answering.

"I think it's highly likely, yes." She stepped back towards them, a serious look on her face. "I'm happy to see you, I really am, but I'm afraid I may be about to make your lives... difficult again."

"What's going on?" asked Maya.

"Come with me and you'll see," replied Misato and turned through the security gate. They had no choice but to follow.

* * *

They passed through corridors busy with technicians and military personnel, down staircases and escalators, through a laboratory area and past a barracks. The walls were reinforced steel and the floors grated. Everything looked either brand new, or still under construction and everywhere was well lit and clean, if not entirely tidy. The corridors had a feeling of a submarine to them, but technical bays and laboratories gave it more of a space station aspect.

And always they went down, deeper underground.

And always Maya's sense of foreboding grew.

"We aren't nearly as well funded as Nerv was before third impact," Misato was telling them as they stood on a travelator, "but this place is getting up to speed in a very short space of time. Until recently, this was to be Kaibyaku's disaster relief centre, one of several dotted around the city. It's nowhere near as big as it seems."

"What is it now?" asked Maya.

"Now it's been co-opted by the UN for our purposes and serves as a military research facility."

"The _UN_?" said Asuka, "The UN are already back to this level?"

"A lot of the infrastructure was left untouched during third impact," replied Misato, "when the Secretary-General returned from complementation, he quickly set about drawing the various scattered branches back together."

"Why?" asked Maya, annoyed at how humanity seemed insistent on repeating old mistakes. "The Angels are gone. Why not let people get back on their feet on their own terms. Why do they always have to have one all controlling organisation?"

"I would have agreed with you up until a few weeks ago," replied Misato, "and in fact the Secretary-General did too. He simply thought the resources the UN once gathered could be put to better use helping people, rather than falling into ruin. But, unfortunately, things have changed." The travelator ended in front of a set of double doors. "Ah, here we are at last," she beamed at them. "You should brace yourselves."

The double doors hissed open and they moved through into a hive of activity. Technicians were everywhere, consoles were being constructed, wiring connected, screens erected. On one wall, a giant monitor hung. The room was abuzz with people dressed in uniforms. They passed back and forth, some comparing notes, others sat at consoles typing, some directing, others following instruction.

"This is..." began Asuka, but she trailed off, her mouth hanging open in utter disbelief. Even Rei looked shocked.

"No," said Maya, in flat denial, eyes wide. And that was all she could manage.

On the wall opposite the massive screen, a logo was painted, one they knew all too well. The half leaf dominated the space, complete with its chilling quotation.

 _"God's in his heaven..."_

But he wasn't. Maya was absolutely sure of that.


	13. Chapter 13

**13**.

The masked man sat at the centre table in the small bar. The dim bar lighting played eerily across the figure, who sat in silence amid the music and the clinking of glasses and the muted chatter. The bar, while being situated in the business sector, wasn't much above those that had sprung up in the refugee sector, catering to those who were finding their new life a struggle and needed some escape – without caring much about where that escape came from.

A large coat, almost a cape-coat, covered the figure in darkness from throat to foot, and a full face mask, shaped like a bird's skull, but with a chin plate and no beak, covered his features. His hair was a shock of black, erupting from the cape-coat's high collar like a dark star.

The man had arrived almost an hour ago, but was yet to make any order. He was yet to make any move at all, in fact. The handful of other patrons that hadn't left since the stranger arrived kept their distance, staying to the tables that hugged the walls of the establishment.

"You a cosplayer or something?" asked a tired-eyed waitress as she approached his table. "Missing the rest of your otaku friends?"

The figure made no reply. She frowned.

"Listen, you've got to make an order or my boss is going to get angry," she tried again, holding up a pad of paper and pen. "What would you like? A drink? Alcohol?"

"Asuka Langley Sohryu."

The waitress took a step back, unsettled by the strangely familiar name.

"What?"

"Where can I find Asuka Langley Sohryu," said the man. "Where can I find Misato Katsuragi. Where can I find Maya Ibu –"

"What are you talking about?" replied the waitress, her voice raising in pitch. For some reason she didn't understand, the names frightened her. She took another step back.

"Where is Rei Ayanami?"

The waitress actually gasped, clapping her hands to her mouth. The figure had lifted its head to look at her. Its eyes weren't human. Before she could scream, a hand took her shoulder from behind.

"I'll deal with this, Mitsuki," said her manager, stepping past her. "I think it's time you left my establishment, sir." His voice was iron hard. The masked man had dropped his eyes again to the tabletop, ignoring him.

"Hey mister," called one of the more inebriated customers, "why don't you take that mask off?"

Very slowly, the figure turned it's head to the man that had spoken.

"Hey mister. Why don't you take that mask off?" it rasped.

"I'm not wearing a mask..." replied the customer, looking slightly cowed.

"I think I'd like you to take it off, sir," said the Manager, "I don't like not being able to see the faces of my customers."

"Mr Tanaka, I don't think that's –" began the waitress, looking terrified, but she was cut short by another customer.

"Why don't you do what the man says?" he called.

"Yeah, take it off!" said another. Neither received a direct reply. Instead the masked man returned his gaze to the table top in front of him.

"Where can I find Asuka Langley Sohryu," he repeated.

A large man sitting at one of the corner tables stood.

"I know her," he said, "but why should I tell you anything? You look like a madman! What are you, some hikky-otaku-scumbag? Have you got some sick fetish going on with that cloak and mask stuff?"

The large man was muscular and a good foot taller than the cloaked figure. He looked like he could have taken anyone in the bar in a fight and washed the blood down with a bottle of beer. But as he stepped towards the figure and reached a hand out to grasp his shoulder, there was a grey flash and suddenly his hand was flying across the room in a spray of claret blood.

The big man screamed and dropped to his knees, clutching the stump of his wrist. Everyone else froze in utter shock, as words of disbelief began to issue from somewhere in the room.

"What the f –"

The cape-coat was shifting, billowing like it was caught in an updraught, though the bar air was still and stale. Suddenly the room erupted. The walls, the floor, the tables, the patrons, the manager and the waitress, all came apart as if sliced by a million blades all at once. Chaos filled the room in a hurricane of movement, and at its eye was the masked man. Then as quickly as it started, the room returned to stillness. Wreckage clattered and human remains fell wetly to the scarred floor, great gashes rent the walls, furniture was smashed to matchwood. Only the dark figure and the big man remained untouched.

The masked man turned to the shocked and bleeding man.

"You know where Asuka Langley Sohryu is?" it rasped. The man nodded, in utter shock. He was going pale from blood loss as it pumped from the stub of his forearm, but the pain didn't seem to penetrate his fear.

"I – I – I work – work with her..."

A strange sound came from behind the mask, as if whatever was behind it was hacking or gulping or both. It was a greedy sound.

"Take me to her."

 **End of book 1.**


End file.
